The Rohirric Bath Tub Race ~ Rohan Summer Fest

[Amhran]

Amhran was busy in the bottom of the barrel, but she wasn't cooking. Indeed, the fire had never materialized (so to speak). As soon as she had seen the leak welling up where the mast had been, she had done the first and fastest repair she could think of, and sat on it. Since this only slowed the leak, and since in any case she couldn't stay there indefinitely, she was frantically using the bottle opener to crochet a sort of Gordian knot with her sash around one of the larger mangel-wurzels to act as a plug. Done! And with one fluid, desperate motion, she stood up and rammed the makeshift plug into the hole.

...well, it wasn't the most perfect piece of plumbing stopperage but it was good enough for government work, as her grandmother would say; and if it wasn't much more effective than her backside at blocking leaks at least now she could help punt. She took up her bread peel again and tried her best to keep the poor, battered Wyrd off the rocks.

[Shivased]

Team Minnow

Shivased grinned at Gwai's comment about preferring a horse as she climbed out of the wardrobe and helped to pull it up onto the bank. I agree completely, she responded and bent her back into a stretch, groaning when it popped in a very satisfying crack. Once she was done stretching she regarded their craft with a small frown. It had been very slow and she was in agreement with her teammate that it probably was because it was weighted down with the chaise lounge. She didn't remember her faithful wardrobe ever moving so slowly, which was sad because it was a very comfortable seat.

Yes, taking the chaise out would be best, it really is too heavy, even if it is comfortable!, she agreed finally and moved forward to start untying the chaise. As suggested by Gwai the cushions were left there, so they had at least a bit of comfort. She also took a minute to eat a bit of food from her bag while she make a check of the craft. Satisfied, she helped push it back in the water and hopped in, lifting her paddle as they headed down the river again.

Her hopes for a peaceful race were quickly dashed as something large sailed past her head. Groaning she lifted her paddle as a shield again, feeling the solid hits of a few things. Curiously the hits weren't as hard as she expected, and a quick check revealed they were vegetables! The work of Rustbucket again, she thought with a groan as she tossed the painted veggies out of the wardrobe and into the river. Gwai was tossing them at other racers, she noted and laughed.

Her laughter died though when she saw where they were going. ROCKS! WATCH OUT FOR THE ROCKS! she shouted to Gwai above the rushing of the water as they hurtled down into a narrow channel full of rocks. Digging her paddle into the water, she pushed off a larger rock before it hit their battered wardrobe and did her best to keep them away from other rocks protruding form the water, while hoping they made it out of the channel in one piece!

[Gwai]

Team Minnow

The incessant pelting of the painted vegetables eventually stopped, and Gwai brushed remnants of turnips portions off her shirt. A few of her thrown vegetables had found purchase against the sail of one of their competitors, and Gwai pursed her lips, unsure how she felt about this development. Still, they must carry on, particularly as this area of the river was so boggy there was nothing but weeds, keeping them bogged down. She sat back down and grunted as she dug the paddle into the water, trying to get some sort of speed going.

She was focused on the task of paddling, not paying as much attention to the direction, when Shivased yelled about rocks ahead. Startled, Gwai looked upward, and swallowed. There were plenty of rocks ahead, and unfortunately no obvious way around them. The Minnow bumped hard against a few, but Gwai barely noticed as she continued concentrating on paddling to get through this portion of the river. That stopped suddenly, however, when the river ahead abruptly dropped away. With so many rocks around, there was no chance to paddle for the side of the bank. "Look out!" she shrieked at Shivased, pointing with her paddle at the drop not far ahead and grabbing the side of the struggling boat.

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Silæs ap Trōtter (race adjudicator):

@Elvheimdros (HMS Wyrd had 10HP end of Stage 1 = 5 Repair = 15 <*> They’ve taken damage of -2 and -5 so far in Stage 2 = 8HP)

[Elarith]

@Gwai @Shivased : Really sorry but we miscounted and gave you an extra HP to what you should’ve. You only have 9HP not 10. Have edited back to reflect this.

@Elvheimdros Double checked and you’re right, have amended. Glad someone is paying attention!

[Nerwen Nuke-queen]

Team Drowned in the Rapids.

Nerwen ducked slightly in her tub as the pounding hooves of the horse herds galloped away and as she was crouched down, hugging her knees, things started to whizz and fly over her head. Missiles of some sort were smacking in the water, buffeting them and soaking them. Nerwen peeked over the edge during a moment of respite and saw cabbages and cauliflowers hailing down. "Quick, quick!" she yelled, "We need to get out of here before more damage is done. Just as she spoke a huge cauliflower smacked into the side of her tub, crushing the wood inwards and throwing splinters everywhere. Nerwen threw her arms up as the tub started to gain speed and was spinning quickly towards the bank and suddenly, swoosh they were up and then down, plunged into the grimy waters. Capsized! Gritting her teeth, she managed to cling on, splitting and spluttering. Between then=m, they managed to rock the tub the right way up and scrambled back inside but tub was now a generous description for what they were travelling down the river in.

[Calimir]

Team Pirates with Plunder : @Durien

The smell of the bog and rotten pumpkin made Cal's eyes water. "I can't see much, Leowine," the thief-in-chief shouted. "Youll have to be our eyes, I'll keep rowing." And row Cal' did. Something banged his tub and he looked left. Someone was trying to sink them with a pitch fork. He rowed harder trying to get the triple tub boat away. He could hear loud roaring in the distance. But he kept rowing. Léo and him were in with a chance of winning and he wasnt going to give up.

Hit points 11

[KingODuckingham]

Team Stinking Duck-Ship

What more could one want in life? The speed was exhilarating, the danger was spiking his adrenaline, animals were coming from every direction to feed at his table, they were winning a race, and best of all, it was a majestic duck boat. What else was good in life, Conan? Don't answer, it was a rhetorical question.

Oh, he said "The boat being made of something other than stinking cheese." That is a fair point. But hey, they had been looking for a yellow-ish material for the boat, and it was the first thing they had found. Maybe not the best thing they could have found, but the first. And they were IN first now. Surely that was not a coincidence?

Ducky watched the snakes taking their turn feasting upon the boat. He was unperturbed. Snakes were not as lovely and joy-inducing as baby ducklings, but he was not afraid of them. Now yes, their craft was literally beginning to disintegrate due to the various chomps being taken out of it, but....

Well, there was no but. Ducky shut the rational part of his brain down, an easy task.

"NO REPAIRS!" he shouted doggedly. He picked up his paddle and began to smack the water, a bit uselessly in the rapids, but he figured he ought to make a token effort given that he hadn't done much since the start of the race.

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Silæs ap Trōtter and his roustabouts

Silæs stood upon the rocky isle that sprouted from the calm waters of Salmon Pool. Behind him Eagle Falls filled the sky with fume and thunder. He had a good look up river, scanning both channels that led to the placid cascade above the tarn. He caught no glimpse yet of the rag-tag armada, but guessed it would be making an appearance in the not too distant future.

He turned and surveyed his roustabouts’ latest handiwork. Everything was as it should be. Ducks, a veritable flotilla of fowl, bobbed upon the pool. Sloe and Mo had slung a stout net along the length of the fearsome cataract; he could see its bright orange floats in the swirling waters at the edge of the falls. The pair stood on either bank sharp knives in hand, ready to cast the contestants over the thirty foot void when the time came. Jocko and Timmo where postioned on the western and eastern edge of the river banks. They’d placed green flags on tall pole to demarcate the footpaths available to the less daring of the contenders.

Where was Rusty? Was he off devising some other fiendish plot with his Wild-boys? Mayhap! And if he knew the crusty mariner like he thought he did, he’d spring his latest surprise downstream of the falls, somewhere along the final five mile run, where the crowds and dignitaries on the review stands would enjoy it in full measure.

Timmo grabbed the pole of his flag and waved it frantically. Jocko hollered and pointed upriver. Silæs about faced Raedbeard’s speaking horn at the ready.

[Elarith]

AHOY TUBSTERS!
BONUS DUCK / SALMON ROUND!
THEN TERRIFYING WATERFALL END-GAME!

This is it, we're heading to the crunch. When you reach the duck pond, Silæs will offer you the chance to try to catch either a duck or a salmon, which will somehow possibly help repair your craft. Please don't ask us how.

You will need all the HP you can get, as once you're done in the pond, you are heading over Eagle Falls, a thirty foot sheer drop. There are two ways to get over the falls - either plough straight over it and hope you survive, or carry your craft down the footpath but lose valuable time.

After the falls, a straight run to the finish line.

Current leader board:



Team Wyrd - @Elvheimdros & @Amhran

Roll 7:
Moves: 6
Damage: -2
Hit points: 6

You head on down the rocky, rampaging rapids. The poles let you fend off the walls without too much further damage. Though the mangel-wurzel plug is the best use of the vegetable ever devised, it is still a slow seep that may prove costly. Eventually you are through the rapids and tumbling over a short waterfall and into a - duck pond? Well, this makes a refreshing change, as the pond is flat and calm. And you are ever so slightly in the lead.

Will you attempt to catch a duck or a salmon?

((OOC: Didn't think you were going for a formal 'repair' roll but feel free to correct me))

Team Loot - @Durien (Léowine) & @Calimir(Callimdir)

Roll 7:
Moves: 7
Damage: -4
Hit points: 7

Following two other teams down the right-hand channel, half-blinded but paddling like billy-oh, you are buffeted about down the rapids. You go so fast you close the gap on the teams in front but the rapids have taken their toll on your barrel-craft. The duck pond comes as a welcome relief, and you may find some assistance from Silæs's fowl or salmon.

Team Minnow - @Gwai & @Shivased

Roll 7:
Moves: 5
Damage: -1
Hit points: 8

Using your paddles to best effect, you ride out the rapids and emerge almost unscathed. You drop down into the pond below, causing another dent in the side of Minnow, hot on the heels of Wyrd and level with the piratical Gondorians.

Do you fancy duck or salmon?

Team Eaflaed - @Lirimaer (Laewyn) & @Dimcairien Luiniel(Éomund)

Roll 7:
Moves: 6
Damage: -1
Hit points: 10

Punting away from the water snakes, you escape from the low branches and away, into the shallow channel. Though shallow, the stream quickens and you are bounced down four sets of Rapids taking a little bit of damage, over a small waterfall and into the pool below. Phew.

Silæs offers you the chance to try to catch either a salmon or a duck - which will you try to catch?

Team Stinking Duckship - @KingoDuckingham(Ducky) & @Thalionwen

Roll 7:
Moves: 3
Damage: -2
Hit points: 5

I'm not quite sure how but you manage to go down the rapids... slowly? Taking your time heading along this left-hand channel means that you probably don't take as much damage as you otherwise would have. When you finally plop into the pond, you are towards the back of the group - and on the verge of destruction.

Does Silæs even need to ask if you want a duck or salmon?

Team Drowned in the Rapids - @Queen Nerwen & @Balfur

Roll 7:
Moves: 7
Damage: -2
Hit points: 6

From lagging at the back, you float speedily round the narrow channel and hurry down the rapids. The water taken in when you were capsized has you sitting low in the river, and you land heavily in the duck pond, doing more damage. But you have caught up to the non-boats in front.

You are looking unsteady, but maybe Silæs's duck or salmon selection can help.

ALL TEAMS:

Please pick if you are trying to catch a duck or a salmon which will determine how many bonus HP you'll pick up.

[KingODuckingham]

Team Stinking Duck-Ship

Oh joy, oh bliss, oh rapture unforeseen! Truly, the day was dawned now. Lo, the duck-cheese-wheel-boat was approaching its true people. There ahead, he had spotted it from afar, nay SENSED it via intuition...a duck pond! Surely they would reward this team for feeding the little ducklings with their boat earlier? Surely now was the time to repay, if only he could coax a duck to come by and say hello?

For Ducky, this was easier done than said. He beckoned toward the biggest, most beautiful duck he could see, calling,

"Come here my child! Your term of service has begun. I call on you to fulfill your oath that you totally took like every duck in Middle-earth did! I'm definitely not using the power of magic to bend your action to my will! That would be unethical and also ridiculously implausible! But come, little duck, come, and use your power to protect our boat before we go over a gigantic waterfall that without your help will no doubt destroy us for we refuse to slow down for repairs! Not that the lack of slowing down has helped us because I see we are once again in last place but it's the principle of the thing! Just like summoning you to help me is a matter of principle, it can be done no other way! What is a salmon to a duck wizard? At best, a miserable pile of secrets! Hurry up and get over here!" he finished, realizing he was beginning to ramble.

He looked to Thalionwen.

"In duck we trust." he said solemnly, then reached out and flapped the wings of their cheesecraft. "Are you ready to go over a huge waterfall?"

[Amhran]

(@Elarith I'm... not sure, I'm actually not familiar with how the dice roll part works, I just write where prompted. Would it be more fair to the others to use a roll since I did "repair" the Wyrd?)

(@Elvheimdros *airline stewardess voice* Do you want meat or fish?)

[Elvheimdros]

@Elarith @Amhran I read it as a repair roll but I think the question is just whether you were actually trying to get HP back?

@Amhran My theory is the fish will make us more successfully aquatic.

[Amhran]

@Elarith @Elvheimdros Oh, I see. Yeah, if it's all right, let's call it a repair roll in retrospect, so long as Elvh agrees. 6 HP could use some bolstering.

Team Wyrd

And sper-lash! The barrel lands heavily but upright in the mirror-like stillness of the duck pond, its shell-shocked occupants cautiously peering over the edge of their craft as if uncertain whether the peace and calm is deceptive and Rustbucket will appear from behind a bush to throw live weasels or something at their heads.

Nope.

So far, so good.

Just ducks and fish, swimming in their slow, mesmerizing way.

Amhran trails her fingers in the water for a moment, watching the salmon. One nips at her hand and she withdraws, but it's given her an idea. She removes her hair ribbon and ties the bottle opener to one end, sticks a bit of one of Rustbucket's potatoes on the pointy tip for bait, and lowers it into the water.

"I knew there had to be a reason I packed the bottle opener," she says complacently.

[Thalionwen Hunigfolm]

Team Stinking Duckship

Thalionwen hadn't expected the rapids to lead to, of all things, a duck pond. And one also stocked with...salmon? But whatever her thoughts on fish, ducks were clearly superior. A look of absolute rapture crossed the face of her wizardly compatriot as he caught sight of the flocks of waterfowl. Thalionwen watched in amusement as Ducky attempted to lure one of his namesakes over. They were, truth be told, some very resplendent ducks. Unwilling to intrude upon the family reunion taking place before her, Thalionwen sat back and had a nibble of extremely soggy cheese. Amazing, that the massive wheel she'd made had lasted this long and come so far. If anything was left of it at the race's end, perhaps she could display it in the window at her shop, as THE CHEESE THAT TRAVERSED MIDDLE EARTH (SORT OF).

When Ducky asked her if she was ready to go over a waterfall, Thali threw her head back and laughed.

"Oh Ducky, you are funny," she answered. "Life is an endless series of waterfalls over which I launch myself! Of course we brave the falls! And..." she tapped the side of her nose, one conspirator confiding in another, "no. repairs."

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

Éomund - Team Eaflaed - 10hp

The race was going downhill fast, literally. Bouncing through the rapids, Éomund thanked his lucky stars (and perhaps a few other things) that they did not fall out of their craft and that it stayed together as well as it did. Why couldn't this race have been a leisurely stroll down a calm stream and not this river that was certainly out to kill them! Yet again, there was a small waterfall that the Eaflaed sailed over and plopped down from, but at least this time they landed far enough way to not get soaking (as) wet from above.

A moment later they abruptly sailed into a calmish pond. An odd looking person (Silæs) approached them and asked if they would like to attempt fishing for salmon or a duck. Éomund turned to face Laewyn and asked, "Want to go for a salmon?" It would make a tasty snack if nothing else.

[Durien]

Team LittleJohnandRobinHood
NPC Léowine
@Calimir

Léowine was feeling good after Cal had shown up with a hearty breakfast of ale and food. Although his teammate was quick to assure him it was not ill-gotten gains, he was so glad to see it, he wouldn't have cared where it came from. A full belly and the promise of another day of excitement on the river had his spirits soaring as they prepared to push off again. At the weird conch shell sound, they pushed off again into the Snowbourne. Although they weren't in the lead, they were fairly close to the front of the pack and had more than a fighting chancbe at victory. It also seemed their trio of kegs had survived the Snowbourne slightly more intact than some of the other crafts he had gotten a glimpse at.

They practically flew down the smooth waters as they sailed along, and Léowine relished it while it lasted. However, it didn't last long, because no sooner did they see the Entwash merge into the Snowbourne than the choppy waters than Cal's keg took a beating. Léowine ducked as splinters shot over his head. "Are you okay?" He shouted to his teammate, who was managing to crawl onto the lead barrel with a carved wooden horse head in hand. He laughed as his teammate attached it to the front, along with the THIEVES banner that had denoted their campsite the night before. Equally as competitive, he strained with his broom paddle as they drifted into the left hand channel, where the water was smoother but slower.

Léowine ducked again as his teammate shouted a warning, just in time to avoid the worst of the pumpkin splatter. He caught a glimpse of newly decorated teammate and tried not to roar too loudly with laughter. It helped that his laughter was intermittently interrupted with coughing fits as the smell of the extra soft and overly ripened fruit overwhelmed his nose. Even the waters of the mighty Snowbourne might not be enough to wash that stench away by the time they reached the end of the race. He was still coughing when he realized Elvh was wielding a pitchfork very near their floating craft of kegs. He valiantly tried to outmaneuver his opponent, and was barely moderately successful, as the pitchfork damaged their lead barrel, puncturing holes in the wood. Water rushed in and out, causing the horse head and flag to bobble up and down with some frequency, but the damage was not so serious that it could not be overcome.

Unfortunately, the side effect of outmaneuvering Elvh was that they managed to float straight into a fetid pool which stank nearly as bad as the pumpkin. Léowine coughed some more as he struggled to breathe properly. He tried to respond to Cal who couldn't see much, but he couldn't stop hacking up his lungs. He joined his teammate and simply rowed as hard as he could with his broom, trying desperately to steer them. Suddenly, they burst out of the muck and were almost instantly flying down the river as they entered onto a swift current. Once again able to breathe, he yelled over to his teammate. "We're gaining on them!" And they were. Of course, the very rapids helping them recover lost ground were also eating away at their craft. The ties holding the three kegs together were taking the brunt of the force, which was worrisome.

Just as he thought the rapids might tear their kegs apart, they hit the smooth sailing of the duck pond. It was a welcome relief from the onslaught of the rapids. Léowine idly wondered how exactly the ducks and salmon could help them. Perhaps by trying to sabotage their opponents? "Cal, are you in the mood for duck or salmon?" He could go for some salmon, but his preference wasn't a strong one if his teammate had a different one. In any case, they had to catch something fast, for he could faintly hear the roar of the waterfalls ahead. Despite their craft being substantially damaged, they would need to risk the falls in order to have a chance at winning.

Cal: (Sorry for my absence...life got wonky on me.)

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Silæs ap Trōtter and his roustabouts

@Gwai @Shivased @Calimir @Durien @Elvheimdros @Amhran @Lirimaer @Dimcairien Luiniel @KingODuckingham @Thalionwen @Queen Nerwen @Balfur @Elarith

As the battered craft began flopping and plopping into Salmon Pool Silæs held up Rædbeard’s trusty speaking horn.

“Westu, Tubsters, hal! Westu, Bravehearts all!

Hook you a salmon or snare you a duck: a tag on your catch will determine your repairs… Quackers might count for more than a fish!

Once you’ve got your catch and we’ve patched up your craft it’s on with the Race:

5 miles to go below the fearsome Eagle Falls! Please let me know if you’ll shoot the falls or take the footpaths to the roiling waters of Saruman’s Cauldron far below.

Footpaths will prevent damage to your tubs, but will limit your movement. Leaping off the cataract will give you a move advantage but might wreck your craft/s.”

A skiff put out from the eastern shore, it was piled high with repair materials. Four of Silæs’s crew rowed the wobbling vessel; Rædbeard stood, boot on prow, with a hand thrust in the front of her jacket.

“Get your quackers or fishies!” Silæs hollered at the contestants.

[Balfur]

Team Drowned in the Rapids - Balwen

Balfur resurfaces. His clothes are soaked, his beard is wet (but not from beer) and his mood is foul. Also he is pretty sure a pike or the like has been nibbling at his ear for the past leg of the race. He remembers little since their arrival at the camp. There had been rapids, of course, and rotten vegetables painted like stones (which still seems rather blasphemous to the hungry dwarf). Their tub had capsized at some point and even Queen had gotten wet, despite his best efforts to keep royalty as dry as a biscuit. Well, that biscuit now seems to have been dunked in a lovely ice-cold cup of tea. Balfur starts wondering whether it was a good idea to ask Nerwen out on this not-boat ride. Too late to start second-guessing now! he thinks and turns his attention to the rest of their craft. There is little left of it. He blinks the water out of his eyes. When had it taken such a beating? Was it before or after the capsizing? And why is he having so much trouble remembering? He pauses as he climbs back into the "tub" and stares ahead in shock. Not because of the sudden sounds of a waterfall, though that doesn't help. No, he is afraid he might have had another episode.

After a moment he places himself next to Nerwen. "Sorry, hun. Was just checking whether this... uhm... barrel is still holding up." He grimaces. "I don't think it really is, though. We really need some repairs." At that moment their tub enters the Salmon Pool and a man starts shouting at them about ducks and salmon. Also, there is that woman Rider (or was it MareMaster?) with the Raedbeard. "Are they really talking about fixing up our... uhm, flotsam? he asks his companion, How weird and how utterly convenient! Let me think of a plan"

He pauses and puzzles for a bit.

"Alright, Loveling, this is my plan: we wack a duck, because everybody knows they float and we need the floating power of a duck to get us to the end. Plus, ducks have wings. And we can use those wings to fly over the waterfall ahead.
I have thought about going on foot and I am sure we would be marvelous at it, because dwarves are known to be natural sprinters. But dragging this sorry excuse of a pedalo with us will surely slow us down. So what do you say? Ducks and down the waterfall?"

OOC: Sorry for not having posted, guys. Had a real life complication to deal with.

[Elvheimdros]

Elvh was reasonably proud of the punting, but then he was informed this was a salmon pond - and the ducks, did ducks eat salmon, or share the same habitats? Aquatic biology wasn't really a thing a Rider had to worry about most of the time. Anyway, this Silsæs was suggesting ducks might be more valuable here, but experience made the Wyrd's crew suspect that meant the salmon might be easier to catch.

Amhran appeared to have come up with a makeshift fishing rod, but Elvh was out of ideas and maybe he'd be better off working on keeping their craft steady.

And then it was them and the rest for the falls, and Elvh was inclined to just go all-in over the drop rather than waste time on dragging the keg around.

OOC @Elarith @Amhran Honestly at this point it's probably easier for everybody involved if we just let the last turn stand instead of trying to retro-actively do whatever.

[Amhran]

@Elarith @Elvheimdros Fair enough. Sorry to have caused so much confusion!

[Calimir]

Team LittleJohnandRobinHood Calimir with Léowine(@Durien )

"Duck would be good," Cal' replied to his team mate. "Salmon would be good too. What ever repairs they give will have to do."

Cal' was glad to hear Léo talking again. The last few miles had been all hands on paddle and it was good to have a bit of a rest and chat. "I agree about the waterfall. We're just behind the leader. Let's go for death or glory. We may never get another chance at this."

Cal' found a bit of bread left from Léo's breakfast. It was a bit soggy but it should work as bait. He threw a bit over to his friend and begin sprinkling wet blobs into the water by his keg. Several ducks swam up straight away. Cal managed to grab two of them and handed one over to Leo.

"That should do it," he grinned at Léo. "Are you ready to jump the waterfall?"

OOC: Silæs and @Elarith Raedbeard >
Us pirates choose to ride over the falls.

Hit points 7

[Nerwen Nuke-queen]

Team Drowned in the Rapids - Furner

Nerwen reached across the space between the broken tubs and gripped Balfur's hand. Having spun down the rapids, bumped and rushed across the shoals, thwacked by branches and splattered by bog, she was fairly ready to finish. "Okay Balfur", she said nodding, "I think your plan is a good one. Ducks and down the waterfall!" Silæs, was the man with the plan of ducks, and Nerwen saluted him as they sailed past. Eagle Falls was about a thirty foot sheer drop and the dwarves were going with gusto!

[KingODuckingham]

Team Stinking Duck-ship

They were asking for clarification, and Ducky was happy to give it to them without a moment's hesitation.

"Behold, we shall have a salmon!" He paused, smirking.

"Just kidding." he continued after a moment. "OBVIOUSLY we would like a duck!" he cried. "And then send us STRAIGHT OVER THE CLIFF!" He struck a heroic pose and grinned, teeth gleaming. "To glory and death!"

Wait, and?

[Lirimaer]

Laewyn - Team Eaflaed - 10 hp

"We seem to be doing alright!" Laewyn laughed as they left the snakes behind and the stream sped up over some rapids catching a little on the rocks but not slowing down as they were buoyed over the waterfall into a little pool. "I'm not sure how!"

Éomund was obviously listening to the chap shouting, and said something about catching a salmon. She wasn't sure what that was about, since she hadn't been paying remote attention, but then the man spoke up again.

“Westu, Tubsters, hal! Westu, Bravehearts all! Hook you a salmon or snare you a duck: a tag on your catch will determine your repairs… Quackers might count for more than a fish!"

"Might? What does that mean?" Laewyn's brow furrowed in confusion. "I'm very confused. What tags? Uh, let's just grab something. Anything."

They had a line out, trying to attract salmon with raw potato, but it wasn't working terribly well, since tubers as bait weren't well known, and salmon had yet to acquire the taste. Given time, it would have been great, but luckily for their purposes a duck trying to escape the clutches of rabid barrelriders flew onto the Eaflaed for refuge and Éomund slipped a loop of twine around its foot.

"Alright, we have a duck, let's see how valuable this is at the repair station! And then onward, death or glory going over Eagle Falls!"

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Silæs ap Trōtter and his roustabouts

“Ahoy, Tubsters, hal!” Silæs voice boomed from Rædbeard’s speaking horn. “Quarter of the hour… A quarter of the hour before you set sail once more!”

The tub-wrangler stuffed the metal cone into his pocket and knelt as Team Thieves, Eaflæd, Drowned and the Reeking Duckship steered themselves towards him.

“Thankee, sai” he grinned at them taking their quackers in turn. He held each fowl up and peeked under the right wing. Those that were tagged he placed into a wire coop, after carefully adding the value they represented to the relevant team’s tally.

”All over the falls is it? Stout-hearts you are… But there is glory to be won, is there not, and faint hearts never won unfair Tub Races.

As the repair crew went to work on the duck catching craft, Silæs raised the speaking cone once more:

“Ten minutes! Ten minutes till we resume… Kindly bring your catch over and announce your intentions… Tardy Tubsters will receive the sparsest of running repairs and be cast over the falls when Rædbeard gives the signal.

“You’ll get the best view of the cataract-leaping from over yonder,” he said to the bearded-lady. “It’s a good point at which to blow the conch. On second thoughts… here’s your voice cone, hand me the conch for safe keeping.

Wifur will row you over to the western edge of the falls. There are horses picketed so you can get yourself down river to watch the finish.”

Silæs offered @Elarith a snappy salute then, as an afterthought, said: “I don't suppose you've have any idea where Rustbucket and company are?”

__

Team Pirates: @Calimir @Durien – Duck HP Bonus and Falls Leap

Reeking Duck: @KingODuckingham @Thalionwen – Duck HP Bonus and Falls Leap

Team Drowned: @Balfur @Queen Nerwen – Duck HP Bonus and Falls Leap

Team Eaflæd: @Lirimaer @Dimcairien Luiniel - Duck HP Bonus and Falls Leap


Team Wyrd: @Elvheimdros @Amhran - Duck or Salmon HP Bonus? Falls Leap or Path?

Team Minnow: @Gwai @Shivased - Duck or Salmon HP Bonus? Falls Leap or Path?

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Tubsters: Bonus HPs will be added to your totals and reflected in the update after your leap of faith or cautionary footwork.

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@Elarith Rædbeard - Send them on their way at your convenience :mrgreen:

[Elvheimdros]

@Aodh Hammerhelm Amhran's trying to catch a salmon and I've voted for the falls, so I think that's the status for Team Wyrd.

[Elarith]

Rædbeard stood at the prow of the repair boat, hand in jacket, trying to look resplendent. But something was missing. “The mist! Where is the mist? I’m supposed to emerge from the mist looking terrific,” she hissed at Silæs’s men. The men looked at her blankly. “Fine, I shall do without,” she sighed, and restruck her pose, hoping that she looked heroic even without a thin haze. Maybe someone would commission a portrait of her. ‘Rædbeard crosses the duckpond’. Who wouldn’t want that commemorated on their wall?

When it reached the bank beside Silæs, Captain Rædbeard stumbled ungainly from the repair boat. 'Oh, good idea, looks like an excellent spot for watching the imminent destruction - I mean, acts of bravery," she said, as he pointed out a good vantage point.She swapped the conch for the speaking cone, relieved to be rid of it. "Yes, you take the conch, I don't want to blow it so hard it breaks now. And no," she said, frowning, "I haven't seen Rusty and his miscreants for some time..." Her brow furrowed. No sign of Rusty could not be a good thing. Like a wasp in the room, she'd rather have him in her line of sight at all times.

UPDATE IN ABOUT 12 HOURS OR SO (depending on caffeine levels). Prepare thyselves!

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

@Elvheimdros <<Thanks, freond-min! Over the falls it is....! >>

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

[Amhran]

Amhran knew that salmon didn't eat potatoes, but they were curious. She waited until a salmon swam up for a closer look, then swiftly leaned over and beaned the fish with the handle of one of the spatulas. Holding up her stunned, slippery catch by the tail, she turned to Elvh. "Fish ho. Paddle us in for repairs, comrade."

They presented Silaes with their fish. "We're for the falls, too. And thanks for the patch-up; that mangel-wurzel just wasn't holding water, and I want my sash back."

[Gwai]

Team Minnow

The ride through the rapids left the Minnow a bit more bumped and bruised, but not much more the worse for wear. Still, with all the damage they had suffered over the course of the race, Gwai wasn't sure how much more the old wardrobe could possibly stand. Another plop into the pond, however, and a bit more of the Minnow floated off toward the bank. At least they were close to several of the other teams. This part of the river at least seemed peaceful. There were ducks honking nearby, and she could see a splash in the water here and there as salmon came close to the surface. One of the ducks swam close to the boat, and Gwai made a try to grab him. "We need a mascot," she said cheerfully with a laugh.

The calmness of this part of the river did not last long, however. Gwai looked at Shivased nervously as they began to hear the roar of what could only be a mighty waterfall. She took stock of their craft, which was literally falling apart around them, and glanced back downstream to gauge the waterfall. There looked to be a path on the side. They could most likely bank the Minnow and carry it down the side of the waterfall. However, a look ahead showed there were quite a few other teams in front of them. Taking a deep breath, Gwai blew it out, and said with as much confidence as she could muster, "I think we should go over the waterfall." She immediately regretted her words, but, now that they were said, she felt unable to take them back. "I'm not sure the Minnow will survive," she added, concerned, "I know you've had it for a long time, I'm not sure how you feel about that."

OOC--(Duck and over the waterfall, unless @Shivased differs!)

[Shivased]

Team Minnow

Thankfully their frantic efforts to avoid the rocks saw them safely through the rapids. Shivased breathed a sigh of relief as they plunked down into a calm pool with only one extra dent on the side of their wardrobe, where they could relax at least a little bit for a few minutes. But only a little bit, for they were close to other teams and hot on the tail of one. She took a minute to look around, and was pleased to see it was a rather peaceful stretch of river. Ducks honked all around them, and salmon splashed as they jumped in the air. Her stomach growled at the sight...duck or salmon would be wonderful right now, she thought. Instead, she'd have to settle for a bite or two of the provisions she had brought and a sip of mead.

Quick snack eaten, she looked around again and realized the water was getting a bit rougher, the current picking up. A glance ahead had her heart in her throat. Not a waterfall! she groaned, looking at Gwai who she saw looked as nervous as she felt. Taking quick stock of the Minnow she contemplated the path she could see on the side of the waterfall. It looked like they could get to shore and walk down, but it would take them a lot longer. And, really, that wasn't an option. The minnow might be beat up, but it had got her through three other bathtub races; she was sure it could get them through another.

I think we'll be good, I trust my wardrobe! she replied to Gwai with a grin. Hunkering down and grabbing the sides of the minnow her grin widened. Over the falls it is!

OOC: @Gwai (Duck and Waterfall it is! Yeehaw! )

[Balfur]

Team Drowned in the Rapids

"Duck, duck, duck... thwack!" Blonde Balfur exclaims as he snares a feathered friend and hands it to Silæs. As some (are these the fabled men he has heard so much about? probably) crew starts repairing their sorry excuse for a watercraft, Balfur turns to his teammate. "I'm glad my plan is so agreeable with you," he pauses for a bit, smiles and continues: "I'm also glad that you accepted my invitation to join this silly business. Seems we still make a good team. He hugs Nerwen and produces a small barrel from behind his back. "Take this. It will help you float, if we happen to... you know, lose our lovely Drowned." He turns around to instruct the repairing crew to give them a good sized sheet of cloth. Maybe that can help them with the fall. Or at least with using the power of both wind, water and gravity to get to the finishline.

"Stout hearts indeed!" Balfur nods and he produces a flagon from behind his back. "Ah, Orc Bite! My favourite!" he sighs and takes a couple of big gulps. He offers Nerwen some. "You know, if we survive this. I'll treat you to a duck-dinner!"
"Though I hope there will be towels and dry costumes at the finishline..." he murmurs.

[Calimir]

Team RobinHood&LittleJohn - Calimir with Léowine @Durien

Cal' and Léo's triple-tub looked a lot better after a repair job. It looked better but was it strong enough to survive a waterfall? Cal' gave his team mate what he hoped looked like a brave smile. How high was 30 feet anyway? The walls of Minas Tirith were tall and if the waterfall was as high them they were in for a hard splash down.

As they rowed their tubs to the edge of the waterfall the noise got louder and louder. Cal' remembered some of the older errand riders talking about the siege of Minas Tirith. All of them talked about the terrible sound of battle. Cal supposed that sound was like the waterfall. Loud and scary.

Their tub boat reached the net pulled across the falls. Cal' noticed the water was quite shallow but moving really fast. A cloud of mist blocked his view. He was quite happy about that. "Ready?" he shouted to Léo. "Do you think we should tie ourselves in?

Hit points 7 + ? :shock:

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Goldwhæt "Rustbucket" Dubhlaoich & the Wild-boys

Saruman’s Cauldron foamed and fretted; the clamour of its churning set Rustbucket’s teeth on edge. Combining two legs of hostile water into one stage had seemed like a first-rate idea in a pub in Edoras. Seated on the edge of the Entwash, he saw this scheme as it truly was - the construct of a madman!

The last sighting he’d had of the battered flotilla foretold sinkings along the final stretch of the race were likely. The terrible drop over Eagle Falls, into the grinding maelstrom of the Cauldron, made it a given.

What if no-one made the finish line? What if, after all the long years of the event, someone actually perished? Bema, that would be a catastrophe. And who would be to blame - Goldwhæt Dubhlaoich, esquire, of course.

For the slimmest of moments Rusty considered darting up the cliff path and calling the whole thing off. Kalumba, hunkered on said path, prevented this. That and Elarith's trove of signed indeminty parchments.

The crusty mariner clambered onto the keg on which he'd been seated. Emptied of its contents by Rusty and the chieftain, it wobbled beneath him. Finding his balance, Rusty puffed out his spindly chest.

"Once more unto the creek, wild friends!" he bellowed over the bedlam of the falls. "Once more; to harry and fill the Tubsters with our Wild dread…"

Kalumba stood with a chunky hand upraised."No more," he said. "Wildmen done, Wildmen done good work. We go home now!"
"But…" Rusty croaked, throwing an anxious look at the lip of the falls.
"No but… We go," Kalumba smiled, "but first we thank you, first we make you cousin-brother. You Wildman like us, Rustman."

Bambu hurried forward. In one hand he held two pots and an array of brushes, in the other a thin, wickedly honed knife. "Oh, no! None of those skin inkings,' Rusty clucked. "Paint me if you must, but nothing permanent like, you hear?"

Bill and Ben stripped off the seadog's shirt and Bambu went to work. "Boar fat, Rusty, make muscles strong, make you shine like hot sun." Bristles pricked at Rustbucket's shoulders, back and arms. Added to this discomfort was the rank odour of pig lard.

When Bambu's body-decorating was completed he handed a pot to Kalumba. As the chief began daubing the seadog's cheeks and forehead an evil smell filled Rusty's nostrils
"Is that woad?" he spluttered. Oh, Bema, the stench!
"Rustman, he cousin-brother!" the Wildmen hooted in unison. "We go, see you when another year has turned."

Through streaming eyes Rusty gazed down at the waterskin laid over his knees.

"Farewell gift, Rustman-brother," Kalumba called as the war party disappeared into trees below a ravine. "You drink and remember Wild friends, you drink and enjoy Bambu's special brew…"

[Elarith]

AHOY TUBSTERS!

Ducks and salmon have been caught* and repairs carried out! Now over the falls to impending doom you go!

b]Team Wyrd - @Elvheimdros & @Amhran[/b]

Roll: 8
Moves: 6
Repair roll: 6
Falls damage: -5
Hit points: 7

Amhran’s trap ensnares a salmon which entitles you to some decent wurzel-free repairs. Feel free to keep the fish for a tasty lunch alongside the vegetables you were showered with earlier. Don’t say we don’t give you anything on Tub Race.

Then it’s over the falls you plummet, gaining a nice distance before you land heavily in Saruman’s cauldron below. Anything can happen as you race into the final furlong.

Team Booty - @Durien (Léowine) & @Calimir(Callimdir)

Roll: 8
Moves: 8
Repair roll: 4
Falls damage: -6
Hit points: 5

Your ducks gain you some repairs to make you craft a bit more sturdy. Silæs’s men will sort that out for you. You release your ducks back into the pond - their little wings won’t give you much extra lift.

Then over you go! You come away with more damage but you have flown quite a distance, and could steal a win yet.

Team Minnow - @Gwai & @Shivased

Roll: 8
Moves: 8
Repair roll: 6
Falls damage: -9
Hit points: 5

The duck mascot ensures you have the best repair possible! Just as well. After you launch over Eagle Falls, you soar out like a kite - but then land like, well, a wardrobe.

Can you still make it to the finish line?

Team Eaflaed - @Lirimaer (Laewyn) & @Dimcairien Luiniel(Éomund)

Roll: 8
Moves: 9
Repair roll: 4
Falls damage: -6
Hit points: 8

The duck that you have stymied in escaping has a tag worth 4 points. It’s not that much but it helps make the difference when you float over the waterfall and land heavily in the Cauldron.

You are whipped around in the splash pool somewhat but are still fairly river-worthy - and looking in contention.

Team Stinking Duckship - @KingoDuckingham(Ducky) & @Thalionwen

Roll: 8
Moves: 11
Repair roll: 4
Falls damage: -5
Hit points: 4

The lured duck, fattened on cheese, has a tag worth 4 hit points upon it. The repair crew dutifully patch up your craft - they are under contractual obligations and even shouts of “No repairs!” won’t put them off, alas.

The Duckship slides down the waterfall, breaking up as it goes. When you land at the bottom, you slip a good way towards the finish line. Your craft is now mostly held together by some cheesey force of will.

Team Drowned in the Rapids - @Queen Nerwen & @Balfur

Roll: 8
Moves: 7
Repair roll: 6
Falls damage: -3
Hit points: 9

You have found the golden goose duck! And the tag allows you repairs to the value of 6 points. This stands you in good stead for when you go barrelling over the waterfall. When you land at the bottom, you haven’t travelled all that far but you are in much better shape than any of the other craft.

ALL TEAMS:

This is it, the last dash! Spectators line the banks ready to cheer (or jeer) for you, to watch you win or to watch you get fished out of the Entwash. Have at it!

*No ducks or salmon were harmed in the making of this tub race.

[Lirimaer]

Laewyn - Team Eaflaed - 8hp

The great Eagle Falls provided an exciting (terrifying) minute of staring death in the face as all the new repair work, and more, was damaged by the shockingly bad landing in the Cauldron, where they were again whipped around. This time, however, they were more prepared for how to get out of it, and a quick bit of sculling hard, with some well-timed punting made a huge difference to their position in the race.

"Éomund, we made it!" Laewyn gasped in relief as they began heading down the Entwash at speed, looking pretty good, considering all things. "And we're not far behind the leaders!"

How it was that the cheese wheel had made it over the falls she'd never know, never mind being out in front. As they sculled hard, they inevitably discovered chunks of damaged cheesecraft floating downriver.

"This doesn't taste too bad," Laewyn told Éomund, seizing a chunk and nibbling on it whilst still sculling hard. "If there's any of that ship left at the finish, we'll have to get some more - it'll go nicely with your apples! But come on - let's see if we can win this thing!"

[Elvheimdros]

Elvh figured he'd claim credit for holding the barrel steady, even though he really wasn't sure he had. But it all worked out okay, though he couldn't figure out how to claim credit for the repairs, and had no idea why Silaes had tossed the poor fish back in the bottom of the barrel. Sashimi just wasn't his thing right now.

At all events, they were cast off into the current again and headed for the Falls without any assistance, and made it over and loooooooooong drop without cracking up completely, although the bottom groaned and creaked with the abused it was taking. Should have added a layer of planks back at the rest stop, maybe...

Unfortunately they had sort of flumped down and lost all weigh on the barrel, and most of the rest of the race was streaming out ahead of them now. This was the last stretch, Silaes had said, so it was now or never, for glory purposes. "Let's try one on each side," Elvh said, dragging out the PADDLEAX again for his side, "And may the force (of the current) be with us."

[Gwai]

Team Minnow

The current picked up dramatically as they drew closer to the falls, too swift, in fact, for Gwai to change her mind about taking the path instead of the river. "I have a bad feeling about this!" she shouted to Shivased as they approached the roar of the falls. Gwai could feel mist on her face rising from the waterfall as they drew ever closer, their speed picking up even more as the current took them directly toward the waterfall.

Pulling her paddle in and holding on to the side of the wardrobe with one hand, the duck in the other, Gwai let out a shriek as they went over the falls. For a moment all was calm. A breath later, they were sailing over the falls, straight down into the pool below. The duck, demonstrating a good grasp of the likelihood of a heavy wardrobe surviving this sort of drop, took off in flight, abandoning the rafters to their fate.

The Minnow landed in the pool below with a mighty splash. As they hit the water, Gwai felt herself flying forward, out of the Minnow. She was a reasonable swimmer, but the waterfall striking the pool below, in addition to the Minnow bobbing, created strong currents. Gwai was underwater, discombobulated, unsure which direction was up. What felt like an eternity later, although in reality probably a second or two, she managed to fight through the panic and realize the light above was the sun, and swim that direction. She was closer to the surface than she realized, and soon broke through the water, gasping for air. She swam a few strokes toward the Minnow and grasped the side. "I'm never traveling by anything except horseback again!" she sputtered.

[Dimcairien Luiniel]

Éomund - Team Eaflaed - 8hp

Somehow the two of them were still alive and on top of their craft after their plunge down yet another waterfall, Eagle Falls this time. And for some reason, the duck that they had snared had helped to tighten some of their ropes. Éomund didn't ask why, but just thanked his lucky stars that it was so.

Laewyn breathed a sigh of relief and explained that they had made it. And indeed they had. The finish line was nearing and they were still alive. It didn't look like there were any more dangerous experies up ahead, but who knew. A moment later, she tossed a piece of cheese at him. He took a bite and it was very tasty. If that strange looking cheese boat survived to the end of the race, he wondered if the crew would be willing to share some of their snack.

[Calimir]

Team GambinoBooty - Calimir with Léowine @Durien

If Léowine had answered Cal’ didn’t hear him. He had no time to grab a bit of rope and tie himself into his barrel. Rædbeard shouted “GO!” through the metal trumpet thing and the men on the banks cut the safety net. For a short time nothing happened but then the Booty Boat edged forward. It stuck on the edge of the waterfall and Cal’s heart almost stopped beating. Far, far below he could see tiny looking trees and a pool of water that looked the size of… a tub!

Aaaaaaaaaaah! he screamed as the triple tub leapt into thin air. Cal’s seemed to scream for ever. Water splashed over him with a loud boom. He saw cliffs and rocks and waves and bits of repair work spinning around him. “Row Léo!” he shouted. “Row or we’re dead men!” He dug his paddle into the water and rowed as hard as he could. For a bit longer the Booty kept turning in a circle. Léo must have started paddling too though because suddenly the keg boat pointed away from the boiling pool they were trapped in.

Cal’ paddles harder and the Booty moved into fast moving water that rushed downward. The finish line has to be close, the lad from Gondor thought. If not we’re sure to sink. The Booty bounced off a rock and more repair work went zooming off into the river. Cal’ looked left and right and saw several rivals racing along next to the Booty. The Duck boat was a few boat lengths ahead of them. It disappeared into shadow under a cliff.

“Row, Léo! Row, we’ve still got this!”

Hit points = 5

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Goldwhæt “Rustbucket” Dubhlaoich

Kalumba’s farewell call gave way to the relentless thunder of the falls. Rusty wiped his eyes and uncorked the skin. A quick chug only, he promised himself, a smidgen to help himself think. He tipped back his head and swallowed greedily. Gack! What was in the brew? It smelled and tasted like the stuff Silaes used to clean his paint brushes. Still it had cleared his head, even if his eyes watered like billy-o once more.

Rusty corked the skin, tied it around his waist, and scurried over the rocks below the cauldron. An outrigger, a dugout prepared by the Wildmen for the final sally against the Tubsters, was drawn up on a thin strand in the shade of a cliff. The crusty mariner clambered over the rocky terrain once more, casting anxious looks at the top of the falls. He disappeared behind a large boulder, and emerged a short while later dragging a cumbersome bit of jetsam behind him.

The driftwood was just right for his purposes, stout and sturdy enough to act as a ram. One end of the log had been shaped by rushing water, in his pickled head at least, into the head of a dragon. The crusty mariner rolled the log with some difficulty into the dugout. By the time he’d wedged it under the carved seats in the gunwales and stern he’d worked up quite a sweat and thirst. He stood chugging at the wineskin, runnels of woad and fat gleaming on his scrawny torso.

A fug of rotting fromage suddenly filled the air; Rusty squawked a curse as the SS Stinking Duck bulleted past him. The other craft would not be far behind! The crusty mariner pushed off from the shore with a stout pole. The outrigger rocked unsteadily as it found open water, its bow dipped under the weight of the makeshift ram. The old seadog’s arms pinioned wildly as his steering pole was ripped from his hands. The ram dug into the rocky bed of the river, creaking ominously. Rusty uttered a strangled cry as he was pitched head first into the current.

Water tugged hungrily at him, his boots were sucked from his feet; pebble and shale shredded his trousers. Somehow, and with much splashing, the crusty mariner managed to flip onto his back. Through the v of his naked feet he saw a cliff rushing up at him, a narrow cleft rent the rock face channelling the Entwash into a fissure not much wider than the span of two men. A mile of noise and pent up water awaited him and the pursuing tubs. And beyond that Lovers’ Falls and the ten foot drop onto the open plain and the finish line.

Rusty offered himself up to the benevolence of Ulmo and vanished into the dark terror ahead.

--

Tubsters, avast!

@KingODuckingham @Thalionwen - you're through the fearsome chasm and over Lovers' Falls.

@Gwai @Shivased @Calimir @Durien @Elvheimdros @Amhran @Lirimaer @Dimcairien Luiniel @Queen Nerwen @Balfur: A narrow chasm filled with noise and the pent up fury of the Entwash lies dead ahead; beyond Lovers' Falls and the final three miles of the course beckon.

LAST ROLL OF THE DICE COUNTS FOR ALL!

@Elarith

[Balfur]

Team Drowned in the Rapids

All of it is a lie, Balfur thinks as he sees the other watercrafts pass them by. Ducks aren't fast, they are lazy. I should have known. At least they still float very well.
"Well, Nerwen my dear, at least we didn't smash into some rocky outcrops and drowned. It seems our naming-ruse has kept us up once again. Let's hope it shall give us all we need to finish first." The blonde dwarf still is soaking and shivering. Who knew that water could be so wet and cold? "Our position is not the most advantageous, but I have one last plan. What if I climb into the water at the back and use my feet to give us a speed-boost? And if you can use your hands as paddles at the front of this barrel, it might give us the edge we need!" Balfur barely recognises himself. Since when does he wish to win so badly? Where has he picked up this uncharacteristic little trait? All he remembers from before is his incessant need for eating and drinking.

Here goes nothing, he mutters as he grips the rim of the barrel tightly and hops overboard. With all his might he starts paddling with his feet, his head underwater to streamline his shape in the water. And thus unable to hear the rush of the upcoming Lover's Fall.

[KingODuckingham]

Team Stinking Duck-Ship

It had all come down to this. And I mean that literally, they had plunged very far down over that waterfall. A glorious descent, but the wings had snapped off on the rocks and the paddles had been launched into the spray at some point. Ducky's robes were soaked. His breathing was ragged. He was simultaneously sweating and yet cold. Were those tears on his face, or just the foam of the river?

They were half-drowned, soaking, and nearly sunk. But they were also almost done. The duck had done its magical repair work, and now the Duck would do his magical work. Almost there! No repair! He chanted this simple rhyme to himself over and over as they 'floated' down the river toward the finish line.

To death and glory! Yes, AND!

He looked over to Thalionwen. "It's been a honor sailing a giant cheese wheel shaped like a duck (or it used to be) with you." he said solemnly.

[Lirimaer]

Laewyn - Team Eaflaed

The narrow cleft in the rock face was channelling the Entwash into a fissure not much wider than the span of two men, and as they headed toward it at speed, Laewyn gasped - the raft was wider than that! With such an emergency imminent, both she and Éomund grasped the sides of the raft and together they heaved them upward, creating a more streamlined U shape which battered through the fissure at speed, a mile of noise and pent up water carrying them forward without any help whatsoever.

They shot out of the end of the fissure like a cannonball, scooching over Lovers’ Falls and barely noticing the ten foot drop onto the open plain, as inertia carried them forward toward the finish line. They both let go the sides of the saddle raft and picked up their pans.

"It's 'make your Mama proud' time," Laewyn yelled above the noise of the rushing water. "We've gotta go all out now!"

[Gwai]

Team Minnow

Gwai dragged herself back into the Minnow, making a nice little puddle on her seat cushion, and tried to catch her breath. Her hair tie had been lost when she fell out of the wardrobe, and her hair was plastered to her face. She pulled off one of the tassels from the cushion and used it to tie her dripping hair back. "I can't believe we survived!" she told Shivased, running a hand over her face and blinking to get the river water out of her eyes.

She had little time to catch her breath, however. Immediately in front of them the river narrowed, forming a small canyon, and forcing the water between the high rocks. The current picked up dramatically as well, carrying them forward briskly. Gwai picked her oar back up and paddled a few strokes to at least get the Minnow straight. She knew they were almost at the end of the course, but from the roar ahead of them, there was another waterfall, although thankfully not quite as big as the last. Still, she wasn't sure their small craft would be able to take much more beating. She looked at Shivased. "See you on the other side!" she said with a wry smile.

[Amhran]

Sash tied back around her middle and hair ribbon once again holding her hair out of her face, Amhran felt a little better: if she was going to meet her Maker, at least she would look like she tried.

She braced herself. She was not, repeat NOT, going to scream as she went over the falls. Nope. She would keep calm, and be strong and helpful, and...

At this point the barrel shot into space over Eagle Falls, and she couldn't scream even if she wanted to. She was too busy watching her life flash before her eyes. Later she would wonder if others in her life saw it for the "B" reel it seemed to her in those moments - but not now. The barrel landed with a booming splash in the pool below, and, with a small noise of incredulity, Amhran pulled herself together and brought out the old bread peel to help Elvh paddle.

But...oh dear. Ahead the channel narrowed and the water boiled and churned through it at alarming speed. Amhran only had time for a thought of gratitude that they were only in a barrel and could fit through the chasm opening before they were in it. Neither was entirely sure later which one - or maybe it was both? - bellowed the command "ship oars!", but they both pulled in their paddles, crowded together in the middle with their elbows tucked in, and grasped spatulas and PADDLEAXE ready for fending off the rocky walls on either side.

[Calimir]

Team GambinoBooty - Calimir with Léowine @Durien

The triple keg raced along nicely. Cal's saw that the Duck ship hadn't vanished into shadow, there was a cleft in the cliff and the river narrowed and foamed there. "Hold on!" he shouted to Léowine. His throat was sore from all the shouting. But not as sore as his body from all the bashing and bumping. The Booty entered the ravine with a terrible shrieking sound. "She's way to wide, Léo.. We're going to get stuck" Cal screamed , louder this time because now the noise of the river was like a roaring creature. The front barrel was grinding along the one wall. Cal paddled hard left so their boat turned sideways. The front barrel gave another loud scream then vanished. "Two tubs," Cal laughed like a maniac. "But at least we should get through." He couldn't see Leo, and had to hope he was still there. The thin blue line of light above them started to widen and Cal' saw another wall of mist ahead.

Hit points 5

[Elarith]

AHOY TUBSTERS!

Join us for the tightest finish in Tub Race history! Who will win? Who will lose? Who will be getting hooked out of the Entwash by the repair crew?

b]Team Wyrd - @Elvheimdros & @Amhran[/b]

Roll: 9
Moves: 7
Damage: -4
Hit points: 3

The Wyrd plunges through the narrow ravine, sloshing from side to side and making good speed with the PaddleAxe(TM) and bread peel back in use. You are bashed about and spun around, then thrown over Lover's Falls.

Neck and neck with Team Swag and Team Eaflaed, you hare down the final miles whilst spectators cheer you on. Your craft is much the worse for wear but you struggle on and cross the line in joint second for the stage.

Team Swag - @Durien (Léowine) & @Calimir(Callimdir)

Roll: 9
Moves: 6
Damage: -3
Hit points: 2

Through the chasm you are battered from side to side, losing a barrel in the process. You paddle furiously and are hurled over Lovers' Falls to drop down into the pool below. It's a straight run from there to the end, spectators yelling and waving you along.

You limp across the finish line alongside Eaflaed and Wyrd in joint second.

Team Minnow - @Gwai & @Shivased

Roll: 9
Moves: 6
Damage: -6
Hit points: 0 - Sunk!

The Minnow is buffeted along the canyon, with sodden crew members and a sodden interior where water is leaking in. You make it through the chasm, then tumble over the falls... And break up when you hit the pool below. The wardrobe has come apart at the seams and is a river-going vessel no more.

Silæs and his crew swing by to fish you out. Your race is over.

Team Eaflaed - @Lirimaer (Laewyn) & @Dimcairien Luiniel(Éomund)

Roll: 9
Moves: 5
Damage: -2
Hit points: 6

Your fancy u-shape adjustments serve you well and you escape the chasm with minimal damage. You even make it down the falls without doing much harm, flopping into the pool. Pans whirring, you are caught by two other teams, Wyrd and Swag, and you cross the line together.

Team Stinking Duckship - @KingoDuckingham(Ducky) & @Thalionwen

Roll: 9
Moves: 7
Damage: -5
Hit points: 0 - Sunk!

Out in the lead, you shoot through the chasm, and out over the final waterfall. The Duckship is caught for a moment, golden in the sun, light glinting off its lactose surface; a moment which lifts the hearts of all the spectators. Maybe there is still magic in this world.

Then it splats into the pool below the falls and finally disintegrates into a thousand cheesy fragments. The Duckship has met its doom at last.

Silæs & co. paddle through the curds to rescue you from the wreckage.

Team Drowned in the Rapids - @Queen Nerwen & @Balfur

Roll: 9
Moves: 9
Damage: -6
Hit points: 3

Your paddling from behind is certainly unconventional, but it seems to give you the extra bit of thrust you were lacking. The Drowned is dropping to bits as it goes through the channel, but maybe this was excess weight holding you back because you zoom over Lovers' Falls.

On the final leg, you take the lead by a hair's breadth, and clinch the stage win!

FINAL STANDINGS

In honourable FOURTH PLACE... Team WYRD, piloted by Elvheimdros and Amhran!
In THIRD PLACE... Team EAFLAED, ridden by Laewyn and Éomund!
In (dis)honourable SECOND PLACE... Team GAMBINO-BOOTY, steered by Léowine and Calimir!
Which means in FIRST PLACE... Team DROWNED IN THE RAPIDS, crewed by Queen Nerwen and Balfur!

The crowd goes wild! Old men are brought to tears, mothers hold aloft their children, burly men take off their shirts and swing them over their heads in jubilation.

Towels, warming drinks, and badger burgers await our noble teams, before the trophies are awarded. Rædbeard wonders with slight trepidation where Rusty has got to, then goes to ensure the indemnity forms for Minnow and Stinking Duckship were correctly filled in whilst the trophy stage is readied.

@Aodh Hammerhelm