The Shire Detective Agency

[Taethowen]

A little office has sprung up in Hobbiton (not far from the Post Office). Within, people may leave and answer personal calls for aid; to solve the hundred and one tiny mysteries that arise in the Shire...

Get out your largest magnifying glass and your most sleuth-like outfit as you join the ranks of the Hobbit Detective Agency! Or are caught in mischief yourself...

HOW TO PLAY
Below is a list of Occurrences and a list of Perpetrators! Every round, couple some RP with a gossip or guess of who you think did what. Points will be awarded for successful guesses; 3 points if you guess correctly straight away, 2 points if you guess correctly in round 2, and 1 point thereafter. First player to 30 9 points (in light of how long the first correct guess is taking ) will be named Head Shire Detective (which conveys, at this point, zero advantages, just a title) and the scoreboard will reset.

STRANGE HAPPENINGS
1. Farmer Maggot’s mushrooms stolen
2. A slice eaten from Mrs. Took’s Famous Apple Pie
3. A very rude Limerick written about Lobelia Sackville-Baggins
4. Sending Anonymous Chocolates to Primula Brandybuck
5. TPing the Party Tree
6. Uprooted Hal Gamgee’s carrots
7. Grew a very rudely shaped potato
8. Drank all of Rosie Cotton’s specialty brew
9. Smoked so much pipeweed they went temporarily blind
10. Stole Merry Gardner’s bloomers to make a flag

SUSPECTS
1. Merry Brandybuck
2. Farmer Maggot
3. Pippin Took
4. Fredegar Bolger
5. Rilla Banks
6. Silas Hardwick
7. Pearl Brockhouse
8. Jorgy Underash
9. Henna Lightfoot
10. Dwim Took


RULES
No godmoding or double posting.
Guess once per round (may post more than once for RP purposes).
Rounds will end every 24-48 hours.
Post your guess at the bottom, in bold .
A few lines of RP with each guess, please.
You don’t have to be a hobbit, but don’t be an obvious minion.

If you wish to suggest suspects and/or strange happenings for future games, drop me a message on discord (Rebekah Loper#4402).

Many thanks to @Sil for drafting the OP for me.

[Silky Gooseness]

Silas stuck his head around the door of the office, a trifle nervously. He had looked for a suitable hat, but the springiness of his curls had catapulted his first attempt right off his head. As part of his investigation, he resolved, he would look for a better hat.

The Place was pretty empty. There wasn’t much in the way of Clues at all. Silas scratched his head and fidgeted at his toes before squinting at one of the notes pinned to the cork board.


There once was a Lass named Lobelia
Whose Awful Expresshun was Really the
Talk of the Town;
Because when she’d Frown
She Look’d like a Backed-up Sommelier.

Silas’ eyebrows rose into his hairline. Who amongst his acquaintances would know a word like Sommelier, but also was incapable of spelling Expression? Very possibly it was Fatty Bolger...

Silas accuses Fredegar Bolger of writing rude limericks about Lobelia Sackville Baggins

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Ringbold Took

The gaudily dressed hobbit still walked with a slight limp. Ringo's wounded foot had kept him indoors, without exercise, throughout the autumn and the buttons of his spangled wes'kit held back an ample belly.

He returned now to the Shire, after a dangerous adventure in the Vale of the Anduin, and his intention was to make amends for his rudeness at the Michel Delving market last summer. He had no address for Master Dwim Took, but he was a resourceful fellow and was sure he would soon track down the owner of Unnatural Selections.

A detective agency seemed the logical place to start, but when he stepped into the office he realised there were other mysteries to be solved. His innate curiosity, handed down the family line, was piqued.

Unlike the fellow (Silas) busy chasing down a Limerick-spinning miscreant, Ringbold had a suitable hat. He slipped the deerstalker from his gunna and set it atop his head, then popped his pipe into his mouth.

There was a notice board filled with requests for help, and he read each intently. One in particular took his fancy: grew a very rudely shaped potato! Who would grow something so unnatural-like? A name sprang to mind immediately, without him having to employ his little grey cells.

Ringbold grinned and sent a stream of smoke-rings across the room.

"Did Master Dwim Took cultivate a particularly offensive 'tater?"

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Jorgy was going to do his best to impress Pearl today! He had tried to impress her with his racing skills but that had sort of petered out into a sad, but restful, nap on the grass in a pink bunny onesie. Racing was clearly behind him. It was time for Jorgy Underash, definitely a Hobbit, to start looking for a new career. He learned quickly that he needed something to do here in the Shire. It was mostly fun and games, but there were times he had to do something else. Pearl worked at the Green Dragon. He thought about trying to work there but he didn’t want to overcrowd Pearl or take something away from her. He was a terrible painter, potter, sculptor, calligrapher, and muralist. He thought all morning about what he wanted to be. He ate breakfast, second breakfast, and even elevenses without coming up with an idea. He was in dire straits. What would that say about him if he couldn’t choose a career for the rest of his life in a single morning?! The audacity of it!

Jorgy set out walking, trying to clear his very unclear mind. He needed to think of something. He needed to discover and solve the mystery of what he was going to do. He passed the Green Dragon (no longer scared that it secretly housed an actual green dragon), the Strawberrystar, or Strawstarberry or Starstrawberry (Jorgy was still getting the hang of reading that name was sending him reeling), and the Michel Deving Mathom House (fond memories of mathoms and Jorgyferret at home) and still had no idea what to do about this latest mystery. The mystery of Jorgy’s career.

Perhaps he’d stop by Silas’ house, see what his pal was up to. Surely together they could come up with something for Jorgy to do. Silas was very smart. Like, the smartest. Next to Pearl.

Sadly, he wasn’t there. Another mystery afoot! There were now two mysteries afeet! Jorgy wouldn’t be able to handle another, he only had two feet to handle mysteries.

On his way back through Hobbiton, Jorgy saw the party tree draped in white. He admired it for a moment. It looked rather spooky. But wasn’t Yule around the corner? Hmmm, maybe it was supposed to be like snow? That had to be it. Jorgy beamed with pride in himself. He’d figured it out! It was a very clever idea too. So clever, only Dwim would have been able to come up with something so fun.

Jorgy Underash accuses (for lack of a better word) Dwim Took of TPing the Party Tree

[Zôrzimril]

Pearl Brockhouse

Pearl had just finished a shift at the Green Dragon and was wrapping up in a purple knit scarf and some light grey gloves when she decided to wander into Hobbiton for a bit of a jaunt. It was a lovely late-fall day, and she had always loved the colors of fall. Today, she had a mind to pick up some especially vibrant leaves, if any were still to be found on the ground. Maybe a nice blazing red one, or a deep orange. Yellows would be nice, too!

She walked across the bridge and up the road to The Hill. That’s odd, she thought, noticing several objects strewn across the path in front of Bagshot Row. Her expression brightened at a flash of burnt orange among the pile - some lovely leaves!

Upon closer inspection, however, she saw that the pile consisted of carrots, pulled straight from the fabled garden of Hal Gamgee, no less! Her jaw dropped and she knelt beside the forlorn and abandoned carrots. “Oh dear, oh dear,” she said. “Who would’ve done such a thing?” She pondered the possibilities. Many a hobbit harbored some jealous thoughts about the Gamgees’ brilliant garden, but what hobbit in their right mind would leave carrots in the road instead of taking them home to add to a hearty stew?

She picked up a carrot and examined it. Before she could come to any conclusions, she saw Jorgy passing not far away. “Hallo, Jorgy!” she called, waving to him. “What are you up to this fine day?” Had she not trusted Jorgy with her life (both figuratively and literally, for he’d defended her from strange beings in far southern lands), she might have wondered if he did this. But no, Jorgy wasn’t the type for jealousy and spite. Curiosity and confusion, yes. But not jealousy and spite.

Pearl scratched her chin thoughtfully. She recalled being scolded most bitterly by an older hobbit once upon a time...Yes. She had her suspect.

Pearl accuses Henna Lightfoot of uprooting Hal Gamgee’s carrots

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
A detective agency?! That must be the most exciting thing to happen in the whole of the Shire for a hundred years and Rilla Banks wanted in on it! Soon she’d be famous: all the Shire would be talking about her sheer brilliance.

In a show of confidence, Rilla put on an outfit to show she was quite clearly a most serious and intelligent hobbit capable of solving any mystery: a tweed skirt-suit complete with suede elbow patches and a bowtie. (The formality of the attire was completely overshadowed by the outlandish shade of magenta, polka-dot bowtie and purple elbow patches.)

The blindingly bright-clad hobbit arrived at the office with aplomb and exclaimed, “Sasparilla Brandybuck-Banks reporting for duty!”

“Hullo there!” She waved at Ringbold. “Oh fiddlesticks, how did I forget a hat?!”

“Silas, dear, lovely to see you! What are you looking at?” She lined up beside him, peered at the notice board and erupted into a fit of giggles. “I think they misspelt smellier!” She nudged Silas. “That ‘o’ has no business being there, nevermind the extra ‘m’.”

Once she was capable of breathing again, she reached for her pipe but found she had nothing to put in it. “I’ve forgotten my Longbottom Leaf!” The horror. “Last time I bought some, they’d only sell me half as much as usual because some hobbit smoked so much they spent two days wandering around blind and all they kept telling me was something about lies-and-ability but I don’t know what that had to do with it!” (In fact, Rilla had paid no attention at all to the Longbottom Leaf liability lecture.)

“I think the poor hobbit might have been Jorgy...he seems like he might not know when to put the pipe down and needs friends like us to help him. Um, not that I would know anything about overindulging of course!”

Rilla accuses Jorgy Underash of smoking so much pipeweed he went temporarily blind

[Taethowen]

@Sil - You seem to be the first to come across the rude limerick on the corkboard, and while it is rude indeed, no one has actually filed a complaint yet on Lobelia Sackville Baggins' behalf, nor did Fredgar Bolger write it. Try again!

@Aodh Hammerhelm - Sometimes offensively-shaped potatoes are simply a quirk of nature. Try again!

@Fleeg - What Jorgy thinks is TP actually seems to be all of the hobbit's sheets hung to dry on the party tree. Try again!

@Tarawen - While someone has uprooted Hal Gamgee's carrots, after some careful questioning, you determine that Henna Lightfoot was not the culprit after all. Try again!

@Lailyn - Alas, Jorgy Underash has not gone blind from smoking pipeweed, though it may happen in the future. Anything is possible with Jorgy.

[Silky Gooseness]

Silas Hardwick

Silas smiled uncertainly at the unfamiliar fellow, Ringbold, who strode boldly into the office after him. The chap had a most excellent hat, and quite a magnificent pipe as well. Silas felt quite insignificant beside him.

He did brighten when Rilla entered - or rather, Rilla brightened the whole room. Was everyone here going to be dressed more nattily than he was? Silas fought down the urge to run home and get changed - Ma didn’t approve of “fancy fripperies” anyway - and plastered a wide, slightly manic grin on his face.

“Rilla, how lovely to see you,” he exclaimed gratefully. At least she also wasn’t wearing a hat. “There’s been lots of peculiar goings on lately, don’t you think?”

He stifled a giggle as Rilla made a quip. “Why, Rilla, you’re so bad,” he said teasingly. “Next thing, you’ll tell me you’ve been filching Farmer Maggot’s mushrooms!”

Silas suspects Rilla of mushroom munching

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Oh! Jorgy tilted his head sideways (he’d seen many a pupper do this to great effect) and looked again at the party tree. Hmm. On second thought, that wasn’t TP. Someone was hanging ghosts in the tree though! Scaring himself, as he did from time to time, Jorgy ran straight into Pearl. It was Pearl! He beamed, panted, and beamed again. “Hullo Pearl! Did you see the ghosts in the party tree? Don’t worry, I don’t think they’re real. I think…” he inhaled a huge breath of fresh air, “I think they’re just someone playing a trick. How was the Green Dragon? Did you fight him off?” (Jorgy knew there was no dragon, but he was still unable to fully convince himself that that was true). He offered an arm, just how Silas had shown him when Jorgy asked about gentlehobbitship. “I was just going to head over to the…” he trailed off, his attention instantly bouncing around like a goldfish. He’d been distracted by something that looked like a flag. It was flapping all wrong though. It looked like someone’s underpants! Jorgy turned a bright shade of red. They weren’t his, thank the seed cake maker, but oh wow was that something to behold! At least they were clean. Jorgy remembered in his days as not a Hobbit; if any flags like that flew, the underpants were definitely not clean. “Who’d’ya suppose did that?”

Jorgy suspects Silas Hardwick stole Merry Gardner’s bloomers to make a flag

[Zôrzimril]

Pearl Brockhouse

It hadn’t been Henna. Oh, when would she ever redeem herself in the old woman’s eyes?! Never, at this rate, Pearl fretted inwardly, wringing her hands and pouting.

But Jorgy was here! Sweet, lovely Jorgy. He had a way of cheering her up. Just now, he accomplished the task by asking if she’d fought off the Green Dragon. She giggled. It had been a while since she’d given up correcting him when he implied the Dragon was alive. Instead, she linked her arm with his and walked along beside him.

He suddenly stopped to point out some underpants flapping in the breeze. “Oh no!” Pearl cried, fighting back another laugh. “I’ve no idea. But it seems strange things are afoot in the Shire today, Jorgy dear.”

She herself was still musing on the uprooted carrots. Perhaps Farmer Maggot had spun into a jealous rage at the market, and run over to The Hill to exact his revenge...! “Say, Jorgy, you didn’t happen to see anyone about in the Gamgees’ garden when you were walking over there, did you?” This seemed quite dramatic for the sleepy Shire, but like she had said to Jorgy - strange things were afoot.

Pearl accuses Farmer Maggot of uprooting the carrots

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
“Unless it was me who smoked too much and I forgot all about it?” Rilla scratched her hat-less head and shrugged.

When Silas accused her of mushroom theft, she gasped. “I would never! I-I-” she stammered. “I like mushrooms and all but I swear I’ve never put a toe out of line a day in my life! That sounds like the kind of trouble only a TOOK would get up to!”

“Hmph!” Her chin was wobbling as she flung her pipe into her pocket, crossed her arms and stormed out of the office. Once outside, she plopped down upon the grass and rested her chin on her fist. She thought Silas was her friend but then he went and said she’d stolen the mushrooms - she just didn’t understand!

What would make her feel better right now was a nice warm slice of Mrs Took’s tasty apple pie. The thought perked her up momentarily until she thought that Pippin probably ate it already so she went right on sulking.

Rilla accuses Pippin Took of eating the apple pie

[Silky Gooseness]

Silas Hardwick, In Trouble

“Rilla - Rilla! Wait!” Silas exclaimed, cursing himself. Oh, if only he had a hat to snatch off his head and dramatically wring! He flung himself out of the office so speedily that he stubbed a hairy toe. Hopping awkwardly after Rilla, he fell over almost immediately - fortunately, onto the plush grass that blanketed most of the Shire.

“Rilla - I didn’t mean it like that. I know you would never steal mushrooms,” he burbled hurriedly. Mmm, mushrooms. His belly rumbled embarrassingly at the thought. “I was being stupid. Forgive me? Perhaps I could make it up to you with some pie?”

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Ringbold Took

Ringbold returned Sasparilla’s greeting with a low bow and a tap of his left hand at the base of his throat. He watched as this newcomer chatted to the would-be Limerick solver… Silas, hmmm. The pair where obviously old friends… Ringo made no move to engage these rival sleuths in conversation, contenting himself with ear wigging, and gathering clues, as his little grey cells whirred along like well-oiled cogs in a finally tuned machine.

If only I had my violin, he thought suddenly. Thing always became clearer with a little music.

Movement outside the office window caught his eye and he scooted across the room. Standing up on tippy-toes he peered out into the street and caught sight of a rotund hobbit with a set of gardening tools slung over his back. It had been some time since Ringbold had been in the Shire, but the stoutly built hobbit was unmistakable.

“Hi, Fatty Bolger!” Ringo ejaculated noisily over the sill. “Don’t think I don’t see you with fork and spade looking all shifty-like!”

Ringbold Took accuses Fredegar Bolger of the nefarious uprooting of Hal Gamgee’s carrots.

--

@Lailyn @Sil @Taethowen

[Taethowen]

((Sorry I'm a little late on this, friends, I've had a stupid amount of migraines the last week.))

@Sil - Oh dear, Silas. It seems Rilla has misunderstood your teasing. She has, indeed, not been munching any mushrooms. Hopefully while you're trying to make amends, you remember to keep investigating! Try again!

@Fleeg - Poor Jorgy. This is turning out to be quite awkward so far. First ghosts, and now stray underpants. Alas, your suspicions are incorrect. The underpants were also, originally, hanging in the party tree to dry (how bravely indecent of some hobbit!) but the wind nearly took them away until a fence post caught them. Try again!

@Tarawen - Farmer Maggot does have a temper, but today he is not the guilty party. And someone else has noticed your investigation into Hal Gamgee's uprooted carrots. Be swift, Pearl! Try again!

@Lailyn - Rilla's in luck! No one has touched Mrs. Took's apple pie, so perhaps you'll will be able to have a slice in a little while. Try again!

@Aodh Hammerhelm - Oh dear, Ringbold. Probably not the best idea to accuse someone carrying around a bunch of garden tools without any proof. It might make them angry. Unfortunately, Fredegar Bolger was not the one to uproot Hal Gamgee's carrots.

GM Note - only two three suspects have been ruled out so far, just fyi. (Edit: can't count. Blame the migraines. )

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

He was not having a great go at things today. He was still certain someone was using underpants as a flag, but there were still things about the Shire he was not sure about. He had to remember to ask Pearl about that because she would know. But there other things afoot (boy there were a lot of feet today, it’s a good thing his toes were nice and trimmed).

“Something afoot you say?” he asked Pearl, sounding more overdramatic than he meant (and he was going for overdramatic so one can imagine it was very overdramatic). “What do you supposed is going on?”

He looked about at all the ground, seeing that Pearl was very intent, and saw carrots everywhere! He picked up on and, unable to resist the delicious orange vegetable, munched down on it. It was much harder than he thought it was going to be. He’d never had raw carrots before. “Ow!” he yelped piteously. “Who do you think did this Pearl? Is someone trying to trick people with fake carrots?” I bet it was Merry Brandybuck! He seems like the kind that would do a prank like that.”

He continued chewing the fake carrot. Whoever made it did a good job with the pretend flavor, it takes almost like a carrot!

Jorgy suspects Merry Brandybuck of uprooting Hal Gamgee’s carrots

[Lail]

Rilla Banks likes pie
"Oh. Wait. You didn't?" Her brows rose up and her eyes widened in surprise. Maybe he was her friend after all! "Um, pie?" Rilla visibly perked up. "I like pie!" she replied with a smile. "Yes, yes, of course I forgive you!"

That was when Fatty Bolger came by and the very well-dressed hobbit (Ringbold) in the office shouted at him out the window. Rilla did not envy Mr Bolger in the least and in fact, suddenly felt a bit wary of this meticulous hobbit.

"I guess you're not the only one making accusations," she told Silas with a sigh. "Maybe I'm no good at this detective stuff but I'll say there sure has been a lot odd things happening lately. I thought I saw a mouse chasing a cat the other day! Can you believe it?"

[Zôrzimril]

Pearl Brockhouse

“Yes, something afoot! Though I don’t mean walking,” Pearl said kindly with a smile. “It seems like someone is pulling pranks all over the Shire. Or maybe,” she lowered her voice to a dramatic whisper to match Jorgy’s tone, “committing crimes.”

She watched as her pal picked up and began to eat a carrot. Before she could shout “Oh no, not the evidence!”, Jorgy had cried out in pain.

“Fake carrots?” she asked. “Let me see that, Jorgy.” She took a bite from the carrot he’d picked up and giggled again. “Oh this is a real carrot all right!” she reassured him. “It’s just raw and uncooked. They go soft when you cook them, you see!”

She swallowed the bite of carrot with only a little guilt. Jorgy seemed to think Master Merry was behind the crime, but Pearl wasn’t sure. Wasn’t Merry on good terms with the Gamgees, after all? She felt bad for thinking this, but perhaps it had been her old friend Dwim!

Pearl suspects Dwim of uprooting the carrots

[Silky Gooseness]

Silas Hardwick

Silas breathed a sigh of relief. So Rilla wouldn’t hate him forever! Adrenalin was pouring through him, not least because he now had to obtain some pie.

“Let’s go to the Green Dragon and I’ll buy you a slice of the best pie,” he announced, beaming. “What’s your favourite? Blackberry and Apple? Rhubarb? Plum and pear? And we can even have some of Miz Cotton’s special brew, that is, if Fatty hasn’t drunk it all already!”

Whether Fatty would respond as well to teasing as Rilla remains to be seen. Silas laughed a little over-loudly at the cat-mouse comment. He could be funny! He could laugh at jokes without offending anyone!

Silas wonders if Fatty Bolger drank all Rosie Cotton’s brew

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Ringbold Took

Ringbold was dumbstruck, which was saying a lot (even though he wasn't able to!). He'd been sure his second deduction had been correct. Evidently not, but at least he seemed to be investigating a case of some merit.

He stilled the wild urge to shout out the name of every hobbit known to him, and tuned his ear to the other accusations being made regarding the carrot uprooting. This helped narrow his list of suspects.

Hmmm... Now, if it wasn't someone of substantial appetite (which could be any hobbit) was it someone who'd done the deed purely out of mischief, or worse spite? Surely not! You'd be hard pressed to find a Halfling apt to waste food, or with such a dark heart.

There were two suspects on the list well renowned for pranks and japes. One had already been named by a rival shamus. Which left ...

Ringbold Took suspects Pippin Took of the malicious uprooting of Hal Gamgee’s carrots.

--
@Taethowen

[Taethowen]

@Fleeg - Merry Brandybuck has not uprooted Hal Gamgee's carrots. Poor Jorgy, never having had a raw carrot before. Guess again!

@Tarawen - Dwim has not uprooted the carrots either, but thank goodness Pearl was able to explain raw carrots to Jorgy! Guess again!

@Sil - No one at all seems to have drank Rosie Cotton's brew (yet) so there should plenty for Silas and Rilla to share!

@Aodh Hammerhelm - Pippin Took has not uprooted the carrots either! But surely by now the list of suspects is getting shorter... try again!

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Jorgy didn’t know what he’d do without Pearl. She really was the best. The young Hobbit was quite certain that if Peral wasn’t around to help him understand things that everyone would point and laugh and say “Poor Jorgy” without making any attempt to help him. She laughed too, but she never laughed at him in a mean way, and that’s what Jorgy thought was best about her. Picking the best thing about Pearl was harder than picking out the best rock for Jorgyferret to stand on, there were so many wonderful things about her.

“Carrots come raw?” He munched on it again, despite Pearl’s admonishment not to eat evidence. The carrot was hard to chew but it tasted quite nice. He beamed with joy and turned a little red with guilt. But Pearl had done the same, so it was okay!

His expression changed when she mentioned the word “crime” though. That was a very serious word. He heard that word a lot in Mordor. “It’s a crime that you’re a lava snake”, “it’s a crime no one has stepped on you yet”, “it’s a crime to try and eat your patron” and things like that. Was something like that happening in the Shire?! Oh no! Jorgy was so aghast he stopped chewing his carrot. A terrible thought came into his head.

What if, on the trip to Mordor with Pearl that may or may not have happened, what if Pearl was influenced by something evil there and it made her do crimes in her sleep? She would never even know until she woke up in bed with a floor covered in carrots and potatoes! Oh no! This was all his fault. He never should have taken her to Mordor, if that had not been a dream after all.

Jorgy thinks Pearl might have uprooted Ham Gamgee’s carrots, but in her sleep and unbeknownst to her

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
"Oh yes, let's!" The hobbit lass shot up to her feet with a wide smile then bounced up and down on her toes. "How about strawberry! With a dollop of whipped cream. It's my favourite."

Silas' laughter was infectious and if it was louder than usual, Rilla did not notice one bit. In fact, she erupted into more giggles herself. Fatty Bolger might have given them an odd look as he passed but she did not notice that, either. She was too busy being glad Silas was her friend and she was going to be a star detective and to top it off, they were getting pie (which was the most important thing)!

They didn't get far before Rilla stopped and turned to Silas. All traces of laughter vanished. "I have to ask you a very serious question." Her eyes were wide. "Would you still be my friend if I had stolen someone's carrots?" This was attempted in a whisper but being a rather boisterous hobbit, Rilla had never quite mastered the skill and it was definitely possible someone might have overheard her.

Rilla Banks accuses Rilla Banks of uprooting Hal Gamgee's carrots....if that's allowed.

[Aodh Hammerhelm]

NPC: Ringbold Took

Ringo's tum had begun to growl. Concentrating one's attention on root crops (and pie later!) was no good thing on an empty stomach. The hobbit watched the departure to the Green Dragon of some of his rival sleuths with a keen eye.

Was it one of them? Was one (or more!) of the detectives using their "investigations" to cover up their own misdeeds? In any other corner of Middle-earth Ringbold might have marked this as highly possible, but his fellow halflings were not known for guile or cunning.

Still, the list of suspects was narrowing, and he couldn't very well back up the accusations made by Jorgy and Rilla. Ringo checked over the list of remaining suspects, and after some consideration took another stab in the dark...

Ringbold Took strongly suspects SILAS HARDWICK that might have uprooted Hal Gamgee’s carrots.

[Taethowen]

@Fleeg - Jorgy may be onto something with 'in her sleep' but he can rest easy that it was not Pearl who uprooted Hal Gamgee's carrots. Try again!

@Lailyn - Oh Rilla... while there may be some mischief in your future, you did not uproot Hal Gamgee's carrots. At least not this time. Guess again!

@Aodh Hammerhelm - Alas, it was not Silas Hardwick who uprooted Hal Gamgee's carrots. The list of suspects is growing very short now though... who's going to figure it out first? Good luck, and guess again!

[Silky Gooseness]

Silas beamed from ear to ear. He strode off with Rilla in the direction of the Green Dragon. This investigation was hungry work (even if he hadn’t actually achieved anything apart from accidentally offend Rilla).

At this point, she made a most unusual declaration. Silas looked at her earnestly.

“Rilla,” he said seriously, “I would be your friend even if you uprooted so many carrots there weren’t enough for carrot cake... but that sounds more like something Farmer Maggot would do,” he added with another laugh. There was probably some rivalry going on there.

Silas wonders if Farmer Maggot uprooted Hal Gamgee’s carrots

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

No, no it couldn’t have been Pearl. She was too nice and considerate, even in her sleep she wouldn’t do something like that. Jorgy munched on the carrot again, the idea that eating evidence was bad clearly lost on the young Hobbit. This tasted really good. These carrots were the best! As he chewed his latest bite, something occurred to him. Had he eaten these carrots before? He looked from the carrot to Pearl and began to turn beet red (beets were also delicious but none of them seemed to be uprooted as of yet). What if… well this was going to be embarrassing, and possible the end of his career as a detective inspector. Although, if he were asleep when he did it, was it really as bad? Surely he wouldn’t get into too much trouble, right? What would Pearl think? She probably wouldn’t want associate herself with a crinamal… a crimal… a criminal (there you go, got there in the end Jorgy). A knot appeared in his stomach, the idea of not getting to hang out with Pearl (and probably Rilla, Silas, and Menolly too because who wants to hang out with a carrot thief) made him want to go jump in the Water and just float away.

Jorge accuses… Jorgy of uprooting Ham Gamgee’s carrots

[Zôrzimril]

Pearl Brockhouse

“Yes, they do,” Pearl explained patiently. “All fruits and vegetables are raw before they’re cooked!” She smiled, wondering why Jorgy looked so concerned about this. Or perhaps he was worried about the crimes. He seemed lost in thought for a while as he chewed another bite of carrot.

“Jorgy? Are you okay?” she asked gently. “You’re not worried someone will be angry you took that carrot, are you? It’s really okay,” she went on, giving him a pat on the arm. “I’m sure old Hal won’t mind too much about one uprooted carrot gone missing. He’ll surely be more upset that his carrots were in the road in the first place!”

Pearl was too distracted by Jorgy’s odd behavior to make an accusation in this most heinous of Shire crimes. She watched her friend with concern in her eyes. “Hmmm. Maybe let’s go for a pint at the Dragon,” she said, gesturing back toward Bywater.

[Taethowen]

Rest easy, Hobbit Investigators, the culprit has been found at last!

It was indeed Jorgy Underash who uprooted Hal Gamgee's carrots, apparently in his sleep. Fortunately, the carrots were nearly ready to be harvested anyway, and so Hal Gamgee will forgo pressing formal charges if Jorgy will simply help get them all gathered up--without eating too many, of course.

Go enjoy a celebratory drink and snack at the Green Dragon and then make your way back for the next investigation!

Investigation 2.1 begins now!
If the next culprit/crime is guessed in this round, it is worth 3 points.

Points Tally:
@Jorgy Underash - 1

[Boromir88]

Ted Sandyman

The miller's son was at his favorite spot, The Green Dragon Inn. However, like most other days, he didn't care much for the other patrons at the inn today. One of them in particular, Samwise Gamgee, always had his head in the clouds with his queer, non-sensical, unhobbit-like talk. Ted was in the mood today to make Baggins' gardener look especially foolish, as he did most days.

"Hey, what are you blabbering on about rudely shaped potatoes for?" Ted interrupted. This would be interesting.

"I tell you Ted. I've never seen a potato look like the one Farmer Maggot grew." Sam answered

"And just how many potatoes have you seen? Have you seen, with your own eyes, every potato ever grown?" Ted was fully aware Sam's father, Gaffer Gamgee, was the Shire's foremost authority on potatoes, but he knew his line of questioning would get under Sam's skin. Sea-lioning was Ted's favorite weapon.

"Listen here Ted," Sam fired back. "I'm in no mind for you today. Saw it with my own eyes, I did, Farmer Maggot grew a very rudely shaped potato."

"I give you Farmer Maggot is a queer hobbit, but no one can grow a rudely shaped potato, on purpose and that's a fact. Potatoes grow as they grow. They can't have rude shapes no more than they can have civil looking shapes. What you saw was a potato, maybe a little larger or more spots than others, but still shaped like a potato." Ted felt he won the argument and went back to his drink.

Ted didn't believe potatoes could grow in rude, or unrude, shapes but Farmer Maggot grew a very rudely shaped potato.

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Jorgy, cleared of his potential crimes by reason of sombulmancy and an agreement to help Ham Gamgee during harvest season, was back out in the field. Literally. Jorgy was out in a field, far from Hobbiton and his house, and without a clue. He had been searching for a clue all morning, that’s what one did when one was a detective inspector! Crime was not going to solve itself (unless it was the case of the munch carrots and midnight) and Jorgy needed to be proactive. He was going to find some crime! At least that was what he told himself he was going to be doing. What in actuality happened was Jorgy got distracted by the clouds and all the shapes they could make and when he looked back down forgot what he was doing and decided to go for a walk. Inevitably, this led Jorgy on a wild goose chase. Thankfully, there was no goose though, he heard they were horrible and honked very loudly. He was on a wild brew chase! That’s what he decided it was. He was on the hunt for a missing brew. How did he know a brew was missing, especially when he was alone in the middle of a field? Jorgian intuition, lads. Just sit back and watch him… watch the clouds again. Jorgy!!

He woke with a start, still in the middle of the field and still no closer to find who it was that drank all the missing brew, or what the brew was, or who it belonged to. Despite not having these crucial facts, Jorgy was confident he’d find out exactly what he needed to in order to solve this very important case. He sat back and began to have a thonk. Who likes ale? Well Jorgy did but he was thirsty so couldn’t have been him. Silas? He was too nervous, especially around Rilla. What if it was old Henna Lightfoot! She was light on her… foots. Perhaps he should go have a visit with the old hobbit matron. Just as soon as figured out where he was.

Jorgy believes Henna Lightfoot drank all of Rosie Cotton’s specialty brew

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Rilla woke with a start. And found herself with an intimate close-up view of the table at the Green Dragon. Unaware of the pie-filling smeared on her cheek and the bits of crust in her hair, she sat up and rubbed her eyes. Ted Sandyman and Sam Gamgee were arguing about offensive potatoes and what did that remind her of? Her new career aspiration...the detective agency!

Unfortunately, it was not going well so far. Last she could remember, Silas had agreed to be her friend even if she had stolen carrots and left none for cake. A true friendship then. That was a relief and Rilla had laughed at his joke and he invited her for pie…

“I think I could go for some after-nap chocolates now….” Rilla mused to nobody in particular then yawned.

If only she were Primula Brandybuck, recipient of chocolates from an anonymous admirer. Why didn’t anyone send Rilla chocolates? Did they not know she liked them? Who was so nice that they would do such a thing… of course!

Silas might be that nice! She hoped he wasn’t but she wasn’t sure why she cared.

Rilla accuses Silas Hardwick of sending chocolates to Primula Brandybuck

[Silky Gooseness]

HELLO FRIENDS, as Taeth is taking a break welcome to your new host of Shire Detectives, it me

We have discovered that a Jorgy uprooted Ham’s carrots; but all the other suspects have committed a crime, and all the other crimes have been committed! Match them all up this session and we’ll have new crimes for the next!

@Boromir88 It isn’t Farmer Maggot who grew the rude potato!
@David Bowie it wasn’t Henna who drank all the home brew!
@Lailthoron phew, it wasn’t Silas who sent the chocs to Ms Brandybuck!

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Well, well, well! How the turntables… hmm, that seems to have gone a bit wrong. Just like Jorgy’s belief that Henna had drank all the special brew. Poor Jorgy felt very foolish for having thought that Henna could have done something so dastardly. He decided the only way to make it up to her was to go to her house and give her a barrel. While it is true that Henna had no idea she had been so wrongly accused, Jorgy didn’t want to build up bad “Cart-ma” and having something bad happen to him. The recent scandal with the carrots and Mr. Gamgee’s garden had been enough bad juju for Jorgy! So off he went. Miraculously, Jorgy found his way out of the field. Okay it wasn’t miraculous, he just walked until the field ended and found himself in someone’s backyard. After having a very pleasant conversation with a young hobbit lass named Penny Boffin, after which Jorgy seemed to have misplaced his pipe and a neat rock with a blue streak on it, Jorgy made his way quickly the Green Dragon. Something was a bit odd though, aside form his missing rock and pipe. Jorgy couldn’t quite put his finger on but the air in the inn was different. Everyone was bustling about and no one greeted him as he came in! This only served to deepen Jorgy’s small suspicion that there was in fact a Green Dragon in the Green Dragon Inn somewhere and this was just an attempt to throw him off. There was no time for that nonsense though! Jorgy Underash was on a mission! He was on his way, barrel under his arm when he saw the party tree. He was quite certain that wasn’t laundry hanging in the tree. It was that special paper people used for… well he shouldn’t really say but he was certain it was up in the tree! This seemed just the kind of prank Rilla would pull. He laughed and reminded himself to tell Rilla she was a genius for that prank; he also reminded himself he needed to go back and find his pipe and rock.

Jorgy believes that Rilla has TP’ed the Party Tree

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Well, it seemed Silas had not sent any chocolates at least not to Primula Brandybuck. What a relief. After downing another mug of ale, Rilla exited the Green Dragon and saw a peculiar sight.

A flag or some similar decoration was flapping out the window of the Inn’s attic! A closer inspection found that they were in fact a bunch of bloomers tied together to form a kind of rope.

Was someone trying to sneak out of the Inn or were they sneaking inside? What was going on here? Why bother when there was a perfectly good front door?

There was a host of possibilities. It would require careful thought. Rilla grabbed her pipe - a smoke would help her acuity - and remembered she had no leaf. She put the pipe to her lips anyway and pretended, hoping she'd look deep in thought just like a professional Detective (and not at all ridiculous puffing on an empty pipe).

Rilla knew of one hobbit who worked at the Green Dragon. Pearl was very nice but Rilla wondered...

Rilla thinks Pearl Brockhouse stole Merry Gardner’s bloomers to make a flag

[Silky Gooseness]

@Wildchild, Rilla is innocent of TPing the party tree!

@Lailyn - Pearl is up to lots of things, but flag-making from bloomers is not currently it!

Guess again!

[The Good Hunter]

Jorgy Underash

Jorgy Underash was very capable of miscalculating. It was one of his best skills. He was the best there ever was at pouring too much hot water into the tea pot and making it overflow. There was no hobbit better than him anywhere in the Shire. He could accidently leave bread in the oven too long, leave his inkwell open, and forget to close the door to his house like nobody’s business. It came as no surprise to Jorgy he’d been wrong about Rilla. He was glad actually. Maybe he could convince her to do that with him at some point. It sure did look like fun! In the meantime, attempting to avoid the potential wrath of Silas for the miscalculated belief that his special friend had defaced the party tree with tiny sheets of flimsy paper, Jorgy bought some pastries from the local bakery. On his way to Silas’ house (and definitely not eating all the Danishes and eclairs) he noticed something sitting in the window of a house. It was the strangest looking potato that Jorgy had ever seen. It looked like… well even Jorgy knew not to say what it looked like in polite company. He was by himself but, that he’s still polite? Right? Something he should probably ask Silas. He was overcome by temptation and reached for a raspberry Danish, only to find that he’d already eaten them all. Confused as to what happened to them (ignoring the crumbs on his jacket), he began to think, stroking his chin to stimulate smart thoughts. It was in the midst of this contemplative ritual that Jorgy thought he saw a shape moving out from the garden of the house with the rude potato.

Jorgy believes Fatty Bolger grew a rudely shaped potato

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Hm. But then, perhaps Pearl had not made the flag. Maybe she did not even know about it. Come to think of it, Rilla hadn't seen her in the pub (before or after Rilla's nap) so maybe it was her day off?

OR MAYBE... she pulled a sickie because she had drunk all of Rosie Cotton's brew and was still recovering with a Jorgy-style elevensies complete with bonbons, sausages, cake and maybe even the mysterious dish called danger noodles.

This kind of behavior seemed out of character for the very responsible Pearl Brockhouse, who unlike Rilla, was gainfully employed. And if she had done it, why hadn't Pearl invited Rilla along?!

But a good detective had to consider all possible angles even if it was upsetting not to be invited to the scene of the "crime."

"I'd like some of Rosie Cotton's specialty brew," Rilla mumbled to herself.

Rilla accuses Pearl Brockhouse of drinking all of Rosie Cotton's brew and if true, is miffed she was not invited to this drink-a-thon

[Silky Gooseness]

@The King in Yellow - Jorgy, Someone did grow a rudely shaped potato - but it wasn’t Fatty Bolger

@Lailyn - it wasn’t Pearl who drank all the brew!

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Rilla sighed forlornly and picked at the hem of her magenta skirt. When would there be a drink-a-thon, she wondered? She wanted to make it happen...it would be such a fun time with Silas, Jorgy, Pearl, Menolly and Dwim and of course, every other hobbit in town (except the SBBs who were no fun at all).

A yelp sounded from the Green Dragon! A very disgruntled hobbit-gentleman stalked out the front door. "HOW could they serve a potato shaped like a-" but Rilla did not hear the rest because a flock of very troublesome and loud geese chose that exact moment to fly overhead and cry a chorus of honks.

Oooh like a what? Rilla wondered. Her imagination ran wild. ERROR ERROR THIS CONTENT HAS BEEN CENSORED.

Rilla suspects Henna Lightfoot of growing a rudely shaped potato

[Silky Gooseness]

@Lailyn it was not Henna Lightfoot who grew the rudely shaped potato! Someone else is responsible for this heinous, delicious tuber

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Uh oh. A problem was approaching in the form of one Gorbadoc Banks. He was a well-respected hobbit who never went on adventures, not even very long walks, definitely never committed a crime and according to Rilla, also never had any fun. He was also (ashamed as she was to admit it) her older brother.

And there was nowhere to hide. She tried to sink into the bushes. When dressed in magenta, it is very hard to hide anywhere.

“Sasparilla! What are you doing?” Quite predictably, her brother frowned at her. He didn't have many other facial expressions when she was around.

“I'm working!” Rilla insisted.

“You don't have a job,” he pointed out.

“Yes I do!” She crossed her arms. “Isn't it obvious? I'm being a detective!” (She thought it was - she had the tweed suit, the pipe, the contemplative expression suggesting she was thinking but not thinking too hard.)

Gorbadoc sighed heavily. “You're being a what?”

“There’s been a lot of crimes committed in the Shire and I’m going to solve every last one!! Did you know someone grew a rudely shaped potato AND THEN served it at the Green Dragon Inn?!”

“When are you going to grow up, Sasparilla?”

It was Rilla’s turn to frown. Wasn’t her brother smart? He had some kind of important job that involved sums and numbers and other serious (and boring) things. Maybe not as smart as she thought so she enlightened him. “I think I finished growing a few years ago and this is all tall as I'm going to get, thank you very much."

“You are being deliberately obtuse.”

“No I'm not!” She argued. “Wait, what's obtuse? I thought that was something to do with triangles…”

Gorbadoc shook his head at her, knowing a lost cause when he saw one. “I have important business on my calendar today. I don’t have time to explain words to you. I suspect if someone grew a rudely shaped potato, it will have been Farmer Maggott.” With that, he sniffed his nose haughty and stalked away.

Shows how smart he is…Rilla thought. Obviously it was not Farmer Maggott who grew the potato. But maybe Gorbadoc knew who it was and was trying to cover it up! Who would he be willing to protect? A very distant cousin perhaps...?

Rilla suspects Merry Brandybuck of rude-potato growing

[Silky Gooseness]

@Lailyn: Rilla is wrong about Merry Brandybuck! I’ll give you a clue: it’s not a *canon* character guilty of rude potato growing; but it is a hobbit you have interacted with...

[Silky Gooseness]

ANNOUNCEMENT: Given the leisurely pace of this thread, perfectly understandable as we all have second breakfasts to eat, I will permit up to three guesses to be made at a time. You could accuse three hobbits of one crime, or one hobbit of three crimes, or three different hobbits of three different crimes: whatever suits you best! Have at it.

[Lail]

Rilla Banks
Rilla just could not get her family to take her seriously no matter what she did. Here she was attempting a real, dignified career and apparently that still was not enough! Sulking, she finangled her way out of the bush she failed to hide in and came out with quite a few bits of sticks and leaves stuck in her hair (unbeknownst to her).

Rilla crossed her arms and trudged (or rather stomped) away. “If I had a rudely-shaped potato, I’d save it just for you,” she mumbled at her brother’s retreating back.

Perhaps if she ever actually solved a crime, they might appreciate her more. “In the case of the rudely shaped potato...who else could it have been?” she mused to herself. There weren’t many suspects left.

Silas was a very well-behaved young lad.He was too gentlemanly to admit it to Rilla even if it had been him. Pearl would have had a good laugh about it with Jorgy if she found it in her garden. Both were definite possibilities...

Gardening seemed rather a dangerous business to get into with all these crimes afoot. Rilla was glad she did not have a green thumb. On the other hand...there could be a chance for compensation and/or fame. Maybe Farmer Maggot had stolen his own mushrooms as a strange marketing campaign.

Rilla suspects Silas or Pearl of offensive tater growing and
Farmer Maggot of stealing mushrooms from himself
(OOC: er let me know if I misunderstood the 3 guesses thing)

[Silky Gooseness]

@Lailyn Rilla had guessed correctly: Silas had indeed grown a rude potato, poor fellow. He will be blushing for weeks!

Your guess about Farmer Maggot, however, is mistaken!