Post Office of the Four Farthings

[Sur Vanar Utírieste]

“By no means all Hobbits were lettered, but those who were wrote constantly to all their friends (and a selection of their relations) who lived further than an afternoon’s walk.”
~ Tolkien, Prologue, The Fellowship of the Ring

As you walk along the main street of Hobbiton, you come across a small building nestled between a sweet-smelling candy store and a busy tailor shop. The walls of the edifice are made of fine oak, glazed, and made strong. Positioned above its wide-swinging doors, hangs a lengthy sign with neatly engraved letters spaced evenly: ‘Post Office of the Four Farthings’.

Upon various pedestal writing desks, bottles of dark ink can be found attached with fine chains to light-colored quills. Parchment scrolls of varying lengths have been stacked atop their pine surfaces as well. Milo Poppy and his mail carriers dash to and fro as they prepare to load their ponies with numerous satchels. He raises his eyes at you as you enter and approach his half-round reception station.

“G’day,” his voice rings out in greeting, “How can I assist you?”

Welcome to the Post Office of the Four Farthings!

You can send bills, postcards, holiday and birthday greetings, well wishes, circulars, gifts, and letters to your Halfling family and friends here.

Please keep in mind, this postal thread is for composing messages and sending packages only.

You may also wish to tag the roleplayer of the character you are writing to.

~ * ~

Eriador Mail Service RP - viewtopic.php?f=10&t=515

The Dwarven Express (Post Office) - viewtopic.php?f=15&t=622

The Old Mailing Tree - viewtopic.php?f=16&t=202

Riddermark Ærendgewrit—Rohirric Mail - viewtopic.php?f=12&t=299

Minas Tirith's Mail ~ The Roquen Express Revived - viewtopic.php?f=11&t=474

The Mordor Post Office - viewtopic.php?f=14&t=503

[Dwim]

Dear @Annúnfalas,

I am hoping this letter reaches you in time before you leave the Shire, as I'm afraid I do not know which foreign Elven land you have come from. Your efforts in coordinating the reshaping of the Shire's postal service are profoundly appreciated. I cannot thank you enough.

Our once great service had become a shambles. Letters were taking months to arrive, or were delivered to the wrong homes, or were simply not arriving at all. My neighbours knew more about my life than I did, as they were always receiving my mail, reading my letters with pleasure as if they were weekly gossip articles.

I feel you have empowered Milo Poppy with both the confidence and the organisational skills necessary to lead his team of carriers towards a newfound reputation of reliability, promptness and success. It is with the greatest pleasure that I stamp this letter, the first ever letter processed by the new postal service (I must confess, I pushed in line to make this happen), with full confidence that it will reach its intended target within an impressive timeframe.

With sincerest gratitude,

Dwim Took

[Galadrihell]

@Lailyn

Dearest Rilla,

Thank you so much for the delightful mug! I am so sorry for the lateness of your response. My mother found it and alas, she has the most terrible habit of opening my Mail for me. Out of concern, no doubt; yours truly is a scatterbrained hobbit and she assures me that if she didn’t do these things for me I should never do them myself. A lad cannot contradict his Mother so I shall say no more.

As it happens, your mug found a second life as a Planter; we popped some tulip bulbs in them and we were just getting the most delightful little Sprout when that scamp Pinkletoes knocked it off the kitchen window!! So it has been chipped once again, but rescued; and now it lives in my bedroom.

At present I shall decline to send an invoice to @Menolly re the mug; please don’t mention it again around Mother as I am slightly worried she may March up to Menolly and begin shaking her down which would do nothing for our friendship.

I do hope to see you again soon; perhaps we might have tea some time?

AAffectionately yours,

Silas Hardwick

[Lailyn]

Dear Silas,

Not to worry. I understand how meddlesome parents can be! Wait a minute, scratch that... no I don't.

Mine let me run around and do whatever I wanted to from Buckland to Frogmorton and back! Hm. One time I even wandered off for three whole days and nearly got lost in Woody End but a nice old fellow came along helped me find my way home. When I got back no one knew I'd been gone - not even one of my eight siblings! I'm not sure how anyone could not miss me, do you? I will never forgive them for it!

I am pleased the mug was useful but do you think Pinkletoes was jealous of my fine artistry and knocked it over on purpose?! I would be heartbroken if she did not like me!

Yes! Tea sounds scrumptious especially if there are crumpets, biscuits, eggs and a nice sausage roll! We could invite all our friends from the Walking Club and have a jolly good time.

Your mother isn't cross with me is she? Did the mug smooth things over? Should I keep a wary eye out? I won't mention the you-know-what again...but I appreciate a warning if so. Sometimes I can't tell if people are giving me the stink-eye or if they just smoked a particularly bad batch of Old Toby... those bad leaves will stick with you for a while. Trust me, I know.

Your friend,
Rilla B.

@Sil

[Istya Alassea]

Dear Doctor Longbottom (NPC),

I have a couple of somewhat urgent - and perhaps one not so urgent - questions for you. My urgent one has to do with my infant daughter. I find her coughing every now and then, and shortly after I come to hold her and pat her back, she starts laughing and giggling. I suspect she is coughing just to try and get my attention. How would I know this for certain? Are there any symptoms I should look out for to make sure she just wants her mother's attention or to see if the coughing is something a little more serious?

I also want to say that your idea to re-open the Shire Medical Clinic here has been a little bit of a bust. No one is getting sick! I know we are in strange times and that hobbits don't normally leave their homes anyway - whether or not strange times are upon us. But what do you think I should do in order to bring in the crowds? Be grateful that we are all okay? I don't want to go around dismantling hobbit hole doors or carving out random holes in the ground in certain places around Hobbiton, so I would like your suggestions as to what I should do in order to gain more interest in the establishment.

Thank you for your time!

Istya Alassea

[Baphởmet]

Dear Silas,

Did I spell that rite? Pearl thout I should praktis writing letters two my friends and I thout it wood be great if I sent you one. I hope things are going good for you. I am doing ok. My hobbbit hole is coming along nicely. Yesterday I bought a chair to sit on! Before that I had been sitting on a stool in the living room. Pearl told me that stool was supposed to be outside. Did you kno that? Some stools can be for inside and some for outside? I had no idea. I am learning a lot. I am going to try to start painting tomorrow. I bought something called a smock to make sure I didn’t get paint all over the floor. I am going to paint some froots. I think apples would be very interesting to paint, or perhaps some cherryes. Maybe both! Wouldn’t that be fun? I hope I do a good job on it. I saw all the paintings in your house when I was over for your birthday (how is Pinkletoes?) and thought they were so amazing. Maybe one day I can paint like that. Did you take lessons? Jorgyferret is doing well, he doesn’t eat or talk much but he is a very good companion. He is a good lissner. Any way, Pearl thinks I should invite you to second breakfast soon. I am getting better at couking. I can make panned cakes now. They are very tastey. I hope you can come by and see me, it would be lots of fon.

Jorgy Underash
-----
@Goosil

[Galadrihell]

Dear Master Jorgy,

How Absolutely Delightful it is to hear (well, see) from you, my Friend! I see all those *hours* of Hard Work that Pearl lovingly put into teaching you have Paid Off. She is simply a Smashing Lass and I hope that you Thank her Appropriately!!

Good to hear that you have Purchased a Chair, have you perhaps checked out Harfoot’s Antiquities? They have a Fine selection of Furnishings for the Distinguishing Hobbit. There is even something that I heard Will call a “Bean Bag” although that sounds to me like a waste of Delicious Beans and I am not at all certain they would be Comfortable. Beans are for Bellies Not Bottoms, as dear Mama would say, although Papa would say they Inevitably Affect the Bottom Anyway.

Enough talk about Bottoms, I hope your Painting goes Well! Perhaps we should go out together some time and Paint in the Great Outdoors: natural outdoor light is the Best for Painting! Pinkletoes is well, thank you. She has now broken;

(1) Lampshade;
(3) Bowls,
(5!!!) Mugs

And had also Eaten part of Mama’s Hairpiece, so is in Great Disgrace, but also Excellent spirits. Her hair balls the week following the Hairpiece Incident were Something To Behold!!!!

Must go, Mama is calling for me!!!

Speak soon,

Your Dear Friend, Silas

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@Ambivalent Octopus